Thursday, January 17, 2013

WrestlingNerd Presents: TNA Impact Wrestling 1/17/13 (You've just been Kayfabed!!!)

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at TNA Impact Wrestling 1/17/13. How does this evening turn out? Let's find out and start the review. 

Match #1: Rednecks and Pot Heads vs Bad Influence
We open up the show with Jeff Hardy. 'You still got it' chants? For Hardy? I have a chant for the Impact Zone. More like 'You can't think', if you ask me. Christopher Daniels and Kaz come out to talk about how Daniels will be world champion. The reason I never said Daniels was the #1 Contender is because I had no idea the Storm/Daniels match at Genesis was a #1 Contender match. Great advertising, TNA. At the same time, it's an idiot moment for me since I must've missed that announcement. Well, it isn't the first time I've made a mistake and it won't be the last. Storm comes out to make this a tag team match. The match was okay, but not very memorable. The finish comes when Hardy hits Twist of Fate on Kaz for the victory. I love how Kaz takes the Twist of Fate. He sticks this neck out there. He looks pretty depressed while going down in flames. After the match, Daniels takes out Hardy and poses with the world title. This is to add build to their title match next week. I know I should analyze Hardy/Daniels, but I'm kinda indifferent to the idea. It isn't bad, but it's a head-scratcher. Let's wait and see where they are going with this before judging. After all, we have two months until Lockdown, so they got more than enough time to build whatever it is they got planned.  

Winner via pinfall: Jeff Hardy and James Storm

Joseph Park just 'kayfabed' Bully Ray with cigars? When I first saw this, I thought it was gonna mean something, but it didn't. I guess Joseph is on a crusade to make people go 'kayfabe'. Apparently, it now works as a verb. How insane. Gut Check time. Blah blah….talking….blah blah…..elimination….blah blah…..dull promo…..blah blah… got a job. Jay Bradley's promo wasn't that good. Your boom stick? BOOOOOOOO!!! You want to see a boomstick…..

Now THAT'S a boomstick. Despite his lame promo, he gets a contract. Maybe we are getting 'kayfabed' here? The guy has the look, but needs improvement in the promo department. He just seems very shaky while talking. Let's hope he can improve on this. The formula doesn't change at all for the Gut Check. The only difference is instead of analyzing one guy, we're looking at two. I love how TNA claimed they were gonna change the format, but you have to be gullible to think TNA did any changes with this. One thing we can agree on is that Jay Bradley is no Ash Williams. 

Match #2: Kenny King vs Christian York
This was similar to their match at Genesis. The only difference is Kenny won by pulling on the tights for the victory. There really isn't much to say here……Look, a penny!!!

Winner via pinfall: Kenny King

TNA is really going overboard with the wedding. I realize it was the main topic for tonight's show, but I think they went a tad overboard with this. Apparently, Hulk Hogan doesn't want to be at the wedding, but Bully and Brooke want him there. It's time for father-time (Sting) to work his magic and persuade Hulk to attend the wedding. Hogan claims he will do the right thing. Yeah, I think that ship sailed when Hogan made a sex tape. Hey, I'm just saying. 

Match #3: Velvet Sky vs Gail Kim
The winner of this match would be the true #1 contender to the KO title. The only reason Gail got this match is because she complained about Taryn's (ie: referee with boobies) officiating. We get another short match. Gail hits Eat Defeat, but Velvet had her foot under the rope. While Gail complains about the call, Velvet hits In Yo Face for the victory. 'In Yo Face' is a terrible name for a finisher. The only purpose of this match is for Gail to get something going with Taryn. Yeah, a Gail/Taryn rivalry. Oh boy…..I'm excited…..zzzzzzzz. 

Winner via pinfall: Velvet Sky

Austin Aries and Bobby Roode join together to mock the wedding, the champions, and the overall company. I need you remember that they object to this wedding…. 

Chavo and Hernandez come out to object in their own right….

Aries objects again….

Now Bobby does it one more time…..

So, Aries and Bobby teaming up against Nacho Libre? While it's a step backwards for Aries and Bobby, I kinda want to see what they can offer as a group. As long as it's temporary, I'm fine with this move. It at least gives them something to do. After all, WWE is doing a similar concept with Team Hell No and the majority seems okay with that. 

So now begins the wedding ceremony. Tommy Dreamer worked WWE last month for a pizza, but worked this show for a box of donuts. He's really downgrading his demands these days. And Spike Dudley's there. How did they book him? After all, he's SO busy with other jobs. Dreamer and Spike? TNA is going all out for this episode. At the end of the day, Hogan decides to walk Brooke down the aisle. Yeah, cuz the question that's boggling the entire nation is if Hogan is gonna be in a wedding ceremony. And I thought TMZ and E! focused on pointless s***. After they are about to tie the knot, Tazz interrupts the wedding and reveals that he has joined Aces and Eights….

Yeah, my thoughts exactly. Well, one thing I can definitely say is I didn't see that coming. I guess there was a reason for Tazz ranting that he was leaving commentary to Tenay and Todd earlier in the evening. With Tazz giving the cue, Card Games crash the ceremony. The show ends with Bully and Hulk taken out. There are some good and bad things with this move. For the first time since the storyline got off the ground, Aces and Eights got interesting again. This is by far their biggest reveal. The last couple of reveals haven't been interesting enough for anybody to care. Tazz gives Aces and Eights another voice. In fact, this is probably the best voice Aces and Eights currently has. Another positive is the move came out of nowhere. Reckon, TNA gave you plenty of clues to figure out Tazz was up to something, but it still makes for a surprise. Okay, now time for the negatives. Does Tazz joining up with Aces and Eights really mean anything in the long run? Think about it? All Tazz can do is cut promos these days. He can't compete anymore and isn't somebody that's gonna provide muscle for this group. In terms of who fights for this stable, you have a bunch of undercard talents that aren't that intriguing. Tazz may add a voice to this stable, but that's all he offers. The move makes for a surprise that was pretty cool, but once you break it all down, the move is probably not gonna mean anything after this. Well, it's still early to judge what this swerve will do in the upcoming months. I know most people were expecting Bully to join up with Card Games tonight, but I kinda felt TNA did this move to get one over on the smarks. I always enjoy it when the wrestling world can get one over on those people, but I better shut up before I continue to piss off people. Seems I've been doing that a lot this week, but I digress. Plus, I think a Bully turn would've been too predictable. Tazz turning isn't really that predictable, which is why I can appreciate it. I always like it when we can step away from predictability factor….At least within reason. Oh, and another positive of this move is Tazz will most likely be away from commentary. That's always a blessing. Way to 'kayfabe' you, right? 

Overall Impression:
The show is very unmemorable until you get to the final segment. With TNA having an extra few weeks to build up their PPVs, they can take their time with building up the show. At the same time, it can also mean more filler or padding. Tonight felt like a combination for future events and filler. This entire evening revolved around the wedding segment. Outside of the wedding segment, the only part I remember was Bobby/Aries. I think if you take out of the swerve, this episode really features nothing. Thanks to the swerve, it can be at least worth checking out, but there still isn't a lot to keep you that invested with this episode. I had a hard time trying to watch this episode. In fact, another thing turning me away from the show was the Impact Zone. I know I've talked about this before, but they chanted some of the dumbest sayings ever uttered on television. I think the audience was the main reason I didn't like this show. They really need to leave the Impact Zone. What I recommend is watching the last 20-30 minutes of the show and you should be caught up to speed. There was a swerve tonight, but will leave you in disappointment when you break down the swerve. Well, at least Aces and Eights gets a better voice. That's gotta be worth something, right? That's gonna do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. Part I of the Best and Worst of WWE/TNA for 2012 is now available. Be sure to check it out. Tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls in the next one. 


  1. I was hoping that someone would get hit with the wedding cake, but I should've known the cake was a lie.

  2. Maybe Tazz will just end up as a heel commentator like he was for the Alliance storyline back in 2001. My guess is the whole "revealing of the members" won't be until the Lockdown PPV.