Tuesday, July 31, 2012

WrestlingNerd Presents: WWE Raw Review 7/30/12 (1001 Recaps)

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at WWE Raw 7/30/12. After the events of Raw's 1000th episode, what did CM Punk have to say? Let's find out and start the review. 

We open up the show with us being informed that part of the Raw set caught on fire earlier today. It appears nobody got hurt, meaning it's time to bring out the pun-o-meter and do a Top Five puns for this scene. Okay, here we go….

5. Michael Bay had another orgasm
4. Jeff Hardy really meant it when he said he was burnt out
3. This is what happens when Kane doesn't have sex
2. Hey CM Punk, this fire burns, right?
1. Kane wanted the extra crispy

We're off to a terrific start, don't you think? CM Punk comes out to start the show. He immediately calls out Jerry Lawler for his fanboy commentary. He claims that he was sending Rock a message and last time he checked, the show does NOT revolve around a part-time performer. He also says the Rock showed him a lack of respect when he confronted him last week. To Punk's credit, he totally has a point. What it boiled down to was Punk was sick of Dwayne Johnson making the whole show about him, so he made sure the show ended the way it should, with the WWE Champion. Based on Punk's comments, I expect him to attack Cena. I've been saying for months that Punk has lost so much focus from other people. Big Show interrupts and he took the attention last week…..or some crap like that, I really wasn't paying attention. John Cena arrives and fights Show, while Punk just sits back and watches the puppets dance. The new GM of Raw, AJ, arrives and announces Cena vs Show in a #1 Contender match. The winner will face Punk at SummerSlam. This was a good opening. Punk shows those anti-hero characteristics that I was hoping to see. He came off sinister, but understanding in his promo. It doesn't make him out to be the bad guy….At least for the time being. The delivery in his promo was also pretty good. 

Match #1: Alberto Del Rio vs Santino
Since the nostalgic boner is gone from a week ago, we can actually show longer matches on this show. After all, they do have an extra hour to work with *cough*. This was an okay match, but it was given a fair amount of time. The finish comes when Del Rio locks in the Cross Armbreaker for the clean victory. After the match, Del Rio claims that everybody is beneath him. Well, it's nice to know what Del Rio thinks of Ricardo Rodriguez. 

Winner via submission: Alberto Del Rio

Brodus Clay is about to dance, but Vickie Guerrero arrives and says she can dance better. Haven't we done this schtick earlier this year? You know, part of me wonders what Eddie Guerrero is thinking when he looks down on the heavens, but I can't blame him. May you rest in peace, Eddie. Damien Sandow interrupts and claims that I is a genius, ATTTTAAAAAAACK!!! Damien takes out Brodus to end the segment. Never piss off a smart person, or else you will get reduced to a dancing, fat-man. I liked this segment. I think it was nice to see Damien confront other insane/silly gimmicks in the WWE. Daniel Bryan and AJ had a quick backstage scene. AJ claims that Bryan only wanted to marry her to have her committed. Wait, what? I'm not really familiar with this, but what would you gain by having your spouse thrown in Arkham Asylum? I guess the argument could be that Bryan was thinking of a way to get AJ away from him, but wouldn't a phone call change all of that? I probably should shut up now. It will be Daniel vs Sheamus tonight, but don't worry. I'm sure we can squeeze in Dolph getting more brain damage for this bit. 

Match #2: Sheamus vs Daniel Bryan; Street Fight
We sure are getting a lot of video recaps of last week, don't you think? As voted by the fans, we get a street fight, but don't you think this poll was bs? Think about it? The three choices were street fight, no holds barred, and falls count anywhere. In many ways, these matches are pretty much the same match (with minor tweaks). I swear that the next poll WWE will post you will be either a ladder match, a ladder match, or a ladder match…..VOTE NOW!!! Anyway, this was a pretty good match to watch, despite the false advertising of "YOU choose the match". The finish comes when Sheamus hits the Brogue Kick for the victory. I guess we will see Dolph get his brain damage on SD this week. 

Winner via pinfall: Sheamus

After the match, Bryan wants a doctor to treat him….Which is ironic considering what happens later in the evening. Kofi Kingston and R-Truth arrive and say Bryan has no place in this ring. Bryan goes over and pets Little Jimmy on the head, only for CHILD ABUSE to occur. Bryan brings out mental workers to take Truth away, but AJ arrives and she wants them to take Bryan away. Bryan is taken to the back, where he would proceed to be hilarious for the rest of the night. 

Match #3: Kofi Kingston vs Titus O'Neil
I think this pretty much sums up the match….

After the shoe toss, Titus follows up with Clash of the Titus for the victory. AW might be looking for a new gig after tonight. Maybe he can have a career as a stand-up comedian? I guess we will find out in a few days what happens to AW. 

Winner via pinfall: Titus O'Neil

Match #4: Heath Slater vs Randy Orton
I love Punk's smugness in his scene with Cena. At it appears we have Legend Killer vs Reverse Legend Killer. Orton's entrance walk/pose took longer than the actual match. Randy wins with the RKO. Now that he's back, the IWC is up in joy since they have something else to complain about. 

Winner via pinfall: Randy Orton

Daniel is getting asked questions from a doctor. Bryan starts to flip out with the 'Yes' chant. I don't know why, but part of me thinks somebody is under that table, which is why Bryan was screaming so much. It should be called the orgasm chant. Later on in the evening, they do the blob/image test to Bryan. With the way the doctor stacked up the images, it looked like a goat-face. I personally thought it was Link with the bunny hood, but what the hell would I know. Bryan starts to think Charlie Sheen put this all together. Yeah, he probably did…..While counting the millions of dollars WWE gave him. This finally ends with the doctor saying Bryan is angry and bitter, but he's completely sane. Bryan is allowed to leave, but not before the lights go red and Kane arrives. He will be Bryan's anger management counselor. For some reason, I want to see them continue this bit. Bryan's at a restaurant and they screw up his order. Bryan yells at the owners, but Kane arrives to attack him. It would be stupid, but it would also be hilarious. Daniel was the funniest character tonight. 

Match #5: Chris Jericho and Christian vs Dolph Ziggler and Miz
Since Jericho and Christian are teaming up, I wonder if shrinkage will be an issue? Dolph and Christian had a minor miscue when Dolph went for that legdrop. I think they covered it up pretty well, but something tells me somebody on the internet is writing, "Oh, Dolph and Christian made a botch. What a bunch of idiots!!! They don't know what the f*** they're doing. Rabble, rabble, rabble, rabble!!!" The finish comes when Christian gives Miz an thumb to the eye, which allows Jericho to hit the Codebreaker for the victory. After the match, Dolph takes out Jericho with the MITB briefcase. I think that Jericho and Dolph will end up having a match that puts the briefcase on the line. I think that could be interesting. As far as the booking went for this match, I was perfectly fine with it. It protected everyone and the match was fun, so I was fine with it.

Winner via pinfall: Chris Jericho and Christian

Match #6: Tensai vs Tyson Kidd
Tyson makes it close, but Tensai is too much. Tensai wins with the Back Splash. After the match, Tensai continues to attack Tyson. The ref reverses the decision and Tyson ends up winning the match via DQ. Since Tensai lost, it's time to kill Sakamoto for the third time this month. Big deal, he has cat blood in his veins. They really are running out of ideas for Tensai since he's having issues with Tyson. In the meantime, Tyson is actually doing something.

Winner via ref decision: Tyson Kidd

Match #7: John Cena vs Big Show; #1 Contender match to WWE Championship
Punk was on commentary for this match. Punk continues to call out King's commentary. I know people complain about Michael Cole's commentary, but King's commentary has been pretty weak for quite some time. In fact, I would say King's commentary has been pretty bad for the last 5-7 years. He does has his moments, but there was a day where King was awesome on commentary. Why is it that Cole gets slammed during his commentary, but nobody says anything about King's commentary? I guess it's because he was around during the attitude era, and you know the internet can NEVER say anything bad about that particular era. I probably should stop before I piss somebody off, but I think I may have already done that. So, the match continues and Cena is once again more powerful than a locomotive, blah blah blah. Yeah, you've seen this song and dance before. The finish comes when Show pushes Cena towards Punk. Cena is about to hit the AA on Show, but Punk gets in the ring and attacks Cena. After the match, Punk kicks Show in the skull. Punk claims that nobody is the #1 Contender and they are both losers. Punk leaves the ring, but not before AJ arrives and puts Cena and Show in a championship match for SummerSlam. Yeah, so I was right again….sigh. The show ends with Punk being angry with AJ's decision. I personally was fine with everything in this scene….until the ending. Punk came off as an anti-hero for most of the night, but instantly looks like a heel when he complained about the ruling of the match. If Punk was a tweener/anti-hero, he would say he welcomes both challengers because he will just beat them both at the same time. This kinda bothered me a bit, but I guess there's nothing I can really do about it. The respect part Punk talked about was okay, but it would've been better for Punk to welcome the match, not be a coward about it. 

No Contest

Overall Impression:
I thought Raw was pretty decent tonight. It wasn't amazing, but I wouldn't call it terrible either (Cue the smarks). Even though they went way overboard with clips from last week, I felt there was a good mixture of storytelling and action. Most of the matches did seem slightly longer since they have more time to work with. I would eventually like to see them not go overboard with clips since you want to take full advantage of three hour shows, but it's a working process. Still, do we really need to see Triple H confront Brock Lesnar…..TWICE!!! In fact, they brought up several topics 2-4 times. Was that really necessary? I hope they try to fix this for future shows, or else it looks kinda silly to turn Raw into a three hour show every week. Despite those hiccups, I thought it was a pretty fun show. Bryan's testing was pretty funny, Punk said some interesting stuff, and the show featured some okay wrestling matches. I enjoyed the show, but I will admit about the predictable nature of tonight. It was pretty much set up for Punk/Cena/Show to happen at SS, so it was delaying it. I think Raw was worth checking out because of Punk and Bryan, but everything else seemed pretty standard. Then again, you might get reminded with 2-3 recaps on next week's show. Again, I really should stop cuz I know I'm gonna piss somebody off. Not what I would call a watcher, but it was a fair/average evening. That's gonna do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. As always, tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls on the next WrestlingNerd show. See you next time. 

Saturday, July 28, 2012

WrestlingNerd Presents: WWE Smackdown Review 7/27/12 (The Boring Review)

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at WWE Smackdown 7/27/12. Yeah, anybody remember THIS show after Raw's 1000th episode? Let's take a look at start the review. 

Match #1: Miz vs Christian; IC Championship
We open up the show with the new IC champion, Miz. Before Miz talks, we get a couple of video packages from Raw. This would happen throughout the night. I'm not gonna talk about that stuff since I already talked about it in the Raw review. If you want my thoughts on that show, click the link at the end of the review. You can go there now, but you should read this AWESOME SD review….eh, who am I kidding. Miz talks about becoming IC champion and thanks Christian's fans for screwing him over. Yeah, I still think the metrics for that poll were made up, but I'll stop now before I piss somebody off. Christian comes out and invokes his rematch clause tonight, so we have a match. This was miles better than the match on Raw, but I mostly blame that on time constraints. After all, we had to plug in all the new WWE T-shirts. Money, money, moonnnnneeeeeey…….MONEY!!! Anyway, this was a fun match to watch. The finish comes when Miz does the EYE POKE OF DOOM. Well, at least there's no finger poking….that sounds inappropriate. Miz follows up with a rollup, but not before grabbing a fistful of tights. Yeah, so Miz ends up stealing this match. I personally thought this was a better finish since it shows Miz's cunning and it sets up a rematch. Now that we've seen a good match between Miz and Christian, I want to see them build upon this. I think it could be fun. 

Winner via pinfall and still IC Champion: Miz

Match #2: Ryback vs Jinder Mahal
We actually get a Ryback match where they actually give Ryback a contest. At the same time, I thought that this was the best match I've seen out of Jinder ever. Who says WWE Superstars/NXT is a waste of time? The finish comes when Jinder leaves this match, thus giving Ryback a countout victory. Well, at least they are trying something different with Ryback…..kinda. 

Winner via countout: Ryback

Match #3: Sheamus vs Cody Rhodes
I thought the Bryan/Sheamus backstage scene was hilarious. I know it's beating a dead horse when mentioning Bryan's 18 second lose at WrestleMania, but I thought this one was handled better. Innuendos for the freaking' win. During this match, Dolph Ziggler arrived and watched. Cody did pretty well in this match, but you knew he wasn't gonna win since he's dealing with Cena Irishman. Just to clarify, I don't hate Sheamus. In fact, I like Sheamus, but he really has turned into a Cena clone since winning the Royal Rumble. This was a good match to watch. The finish comes when Sheamus hits the Brogue Kick for the victory. After the match, Dolph decides to NOT cash in the MITB. Well, this can be viewed as pointless. Reckon, I realize they want to tease the idea of a cash-in, but I feel they are going a little overboard with it. After all, we don't need to be reminded EVERY SINGLE WEEK that Dolph can cash in the MITB for the WHC. Anyway, Chris Jericho comes out, tosses Dolph back in the ring, and now time for Sheamus to hit another Brogue Kick on Dolph. I'm starting to notice a pattern with SD. I swear that every episode of SD features Dolph getting hit with the Brogue Kick. That's also starting to get old. Friday Night Smackdown: Now with more brain damage to bad guys. 

Winner via pinfall: Sheamus

Match #4: Antonio Cesaro vs Santino
This was a short match. The finish comes when Antonio hits the Gotch Style Neutralizer for the victory. With this victory, it can set-up a possible US title feud between Antonio and Santino. Wow, they're actually doing something with Antonio? What is this madness? In all seriousness, it was about damn time they did something with him. Really wish they would find a new entrance theme for Antonio. It's really annoying. 

Winner via pinfall: Antonio Cesaro

Match #5: Damien Sandow vs Yoshi Tatsu
Since Damien got killed by DX, it's time for him to kill somebody that he's already killed previously. Straight Jacket Neckbreaker for the victory. After the match, Damien claims to be your martyr, and follows up with a cartwheel. WHEEEEEE!!!

Winner via pinfall: Damien Sandow

Match #6: Rey Mysterio vs Alberto Del Rio vs Daniel Bryan vs Kane; winner is #1 Contender to WHC
Once again, we get another good match. SD really did deliver in the action department, which is more than what I can say about Raw. Still, that isn't a bad thing. Raw was focused on nostalgia, while SD was more about the action. This match wasn't as strong as the IC or Sheamus match from earlier, but this wasn't too bad. The finish comes when Mysterio hits the 619 on Bryan and Del Rio. Mysterio hits the dime on Bryan, but Ricardo pulls Mysterio under the ring. Del Rio picks the bones and Del Rio is the new #1 Contender……again. This kinda puzzles me. I thought Del Rio and Rey were gonna have a feud. Plus, Sheamus and Del Rio just happened, so this is a little weird. Now, I would think that since there's still a month until SummerSlam, I would imagine Rey getting in the middle of this and making it a triple threat match for the WHC. I think that would be a better idea, especially since Sheamus and Del Rio already had their match and they tied that up at MITB. To be fair, Dolph is still waiting in the wings to steal the title, so you could factor him into the equation. I thought for a moment that Kane was gonna get the next title match. I know it wouldn't make much sense, but I wouldn't mind seeing Kane get a title match. After all, the man has to be depressed, now that his jailbait is running Raw. Something tells me that this WHC picture isn't absolute, especially since a certain suspension from a snake is about to expire. 

Winner via pinfall and NEW #1 Contender: Alberto Del Rio

Overall Impression:
I was mostly expecting a filler evening, but SD did introduce a couple of things…..somewhat. I think people need to realize that WWE put a lot of investment into Raw's 1000th episode, so for SD to turn out as good as it did is amazing on its own. I really enjoyed tonight's action, and I might even go future to say that SD featured the best wrestling out of the week. If you want a show with some decent action, check out this episode. They did establish a couple of things, but I wouldn't exactly say this show is a watcher. I enjoyed it for what it was worth, but I admit that I didn't have much to say. I like it when the reviews are short, but……nevermind. That's gonna do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. As always, tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls on the next WrestlingNerd show. See you next time......GOD, THIS IS BORING!!!

Friday, July 27, 2012

WrestlingNerd Presents: TNA Impact Wrestling Review 7/26/12

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at TNA Impact Wrestling 7/26/12. How do things turn out in TNA Land? Let's find out and start the review. 

We open up the show with Sting. Since Hulk Hogan had surgery and is counting more of his TNA money, we need an interim GM to take over, and it turns out to be John Laurinaitis….wait, wrong show. It turns out to be Sting. Ummm, didn't he step down since he couldn't handle the job? Then again, I'm probably the only one who would even bother questioning this. His first act as GM is to call out Aces and Eights. Yeah, the group that has kicked your ass twice and you're calling them out? This is what old age does to you. Austin Aries and Kurt Angle both arrive since they have a bone to pick with Aces and Eights. Bobby Roode arrives and claims he knows who's behind this stable. Bobby things James Storm is controlling A & 8. Why? Because we need to drag out the plot for 2-3 more months. Storm runs out and attacks Bobby for accusing him. The two fight for a while…..blah, blah, blah. Once the fight ends, Bobby says he will find proof that Storm is behind the attacks. Well, this is an interesting start to the show. I think for the next few weeks, they will be pointing fingers at who may be responsible for these attacks. This would be the theme as the show continued….If you want to call it that. Either way, I guess you can say that Roode has……Stormed out…..

Match #1: Gail Kim and Madison Rayne vs Mickie James and Tara
For establishing the storyline of Madison being interesting in referee, Earl Hebner, they really haven't done much with it. In fact, I don't think the established kayfabe was really a factor in this match. The match is about what you expect. The finish comes when Mickie goes for a bridge pinfall attempt, but both her and Madison's shoulders were down on the mat. Just before Earl counts to three, Madison gets her shoulder up, so she steals this match. Were you lost during that whole rant? Well, I wouldn't blame you. I had to watch this match a second time because it confused the hell out of me when I saw it the first time. I get what they were trying to do here, but it looked a bit sloppy. That's a great way to open up a show. A match that was confusing to determine the winner. We're in for a great evening, aren't we? 

Winner via instant replay: Madison Rayne and Gail Kim

Match #2: Sam Shaw vs Douglas Williams; Gut Check
Awwwwwww, I thought we were taking a break from this concept for this month? Well, because people demanded it……I think, the Gut Check is back. Shaw seems to be going with this extreme sports sort-of gimmick. I guess we need more extreme stuff in wrestling……or I should say EXTREME!!! EXTREEEEEEEEEMMMME!!! Well, he's EXTREMELY unimpressive and bland. Joey Ryan showed up in the audience during this match and punched one of the TNA agents (Al Snow, I believe. Don't quote me on that). I still find it hilarious that the guy "without" a contract has a working storyline; while two people have received a contract and have been ghost during this whole time. Because of Ryan's interference, Shaw took his eye off the ball. Douglas hits Chaos Theory for the victory. I wish I could utilize Chaos Control right about now. 

Winner via pinfall: Douglas Williams

Aries is backstage and…..Evaluates X Division guys to determine who gets an X Division title shot tonight? Isn't this supposed to happen during Open Fight Night? So, you can call tonight's show OFN 2.0 considering that half of OFN ended up on tonight's show. I really don't like this. It really just shows poor time management on TNA's part. Anyway, A Double cuts Rashard Cameron because his headband is a little blue. Sonjay Dutt, Dakota Darsow, and Kenny King still remain. Chavo Guerrero makes his TNA debut in the ring. He talks about the Guerrero legacy and how he wants to become a champion in TNA. Hey, the guy hasn't been champion in a long time…..Unless you count all those stupid segments with Hornswoggle. I'd consider that the Mockery Championship. Hmmm…..I just made myself sad for some reason. Anyway, Kid Kash and Gunner arrive. Wow, they REALLY didn't have anyone else available if they got these guys to interrupt. Did anyone else feel that Kash was completely drunk? He kept going in circles during his entire promo. They mock the Guerrero name until they fight. Hernandez arrives to even the odds. Not even in TNA, Chavo can't get the John Cena treatment. Joking aside, I look forward to what Chavo can do in TNA. The guy can still go, which is something considering his age. 

Match #3: James Storm vs AJ Styles; BFG Series
Kurt confronted Storm about the possibility of being the ring leader of Aces and Eights. Storm claims he's not running the show, but you get a shot of Storm being a little suspicious…..

Storm and Styles delivered a pretty good match. I advise checking this out since I think most of you would get an enjoyment out of this. The finish comes when after a ton of counters, A & 8 arrive and attack Styles and the referee. And then it…..Goes to commercial? Dafaq? That commercial break really seems out of place. Did the budget give out again? Oh well. Storm was the only one not attacked by the stable, leading to more theories that Storm is behind all of this. It appears somebody has some explaining to do. Hey, I just realized we didn't get another episode of All My Retards, starring Claire Lynch. PARTY!!!

No Contest; Both guys get 2 points

Gut Check…….Zzzzzzzzzzzz. Shaw gets a contract. Congratulations…..See you 8 months from now when you get your release. I'm not really big on this guy. His style can work for the X Division, but I think they got better guys for the X Division. Then again, getting a contract, via the Gut Check is like going into the witness protection program. You'll never see them again. Strange, isn't it? I think TNA is doing something illegal. In another backstage scene, Aries cuts Dakota. Being the son of the Repo Man does have its perks. Instead of being the first cut, he was the SECOND cut. Watch out for this guy cuz he's going…….Absolutely nowhere. 

Match #4: Zema Ion vs Kenny King; X Division Championship
Notice how every time somebody picks the opponent for these championship matches, they never win. I'm starting to think this whole OFN deal has completely fallen flat on its face. It's not a terrible idea, but I don't think it's being executed well. The match was okay, at best. The finish comes when Bobby comes back into the arena and attacks Kenny. Zema is able to take advantage and hits the Moonsault for the victory. After the match, Aries and Bobby fight each other. We would later find out that it will be Aries and Kenny vs Bobby and Zema for next week's show. It seems that TNA wants to give Kenny some spotlight, which I don't have a problem with. Personally, I'm not really big on Sonjay, so I don't mind him getting passed over. The guy can wrestle, but I find his personality dreadful at times. If you listen, you can hear the internet screaming their lungs at me for saying that.

Winner via pinfall and still X Division Champion: Zema Ion

Match #5: Kurt Angle vs Bully Ray; BFG Series
Once again, another good match. Lots of counters and great back and forth action. The finish comes when Kurt hits the Angle Slam for the victory. After the match, A & 8 arrive and attack Kurt. Styles, Aries, and Sting arrive to help Kurt out. I love this shot. You see Styles and Aries running, but you see Sting trotting along. It's like his body gave up on him. Somebody give that man a cane. The fight is pretty balanced until Storm arrives to help out the good guys…..or does he? After Aces and Eights leave, Kurt and Aries really question Storm's motives. Yeah, so I guess they want to put the focus on "who's the boss?" until they finally reveal who's controlling Aces and Eights. I highly doubt Storm would be the culprit, but at least it eats up time. I wouldn't be surprised if they don't reveal the boss of Aces and Eights until Bound for Glory. If that's the case, this could get very interesting or very stupid. For the time being, I don't have a problem with this approach, but I hope they can do their homework with this storyline. I don't think we need another Clair Lynch storyline running around now. 

Winner via pinfall: Kurt Angle

Overall Impression:
I really felt the filler nature for tonight's show. Sure, they did introduce the idea that Storm could be leading Aces and Eights, but I really don't see that as an argument to claim this show is a watcher. While the show featured a couple of decent matches, I just couldn't get into the show. I was bored during several parts of this show, and I'm sure that wasn't the idea. I really do wonder why part of the OFN concept ended up on tonight's show. I can't help but think that TNA is trying to include too many things in one show. I hate it when you cram a show because that's when it gets crowded, confusing, and hard to watch. I hope this is only a minor set back since I think TNA was starting to get on the right track. Of course, TNA still has a long, long, LONG way to go before challenging WWE. I know the IWC would say otherwise, but I think WWE comes out of this week looking better, especially since they gave you a pretty decent reason to tune in next week. Tonight's show is what I would consider average, but there isn't a whole lot to go off of here. You can possibly find yourself bored with it, but it's tolerable. Take of that whatever you will. That's gonna do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. As always, tell me what you thought of my review and tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls on the next WrestlingNerd show. See you next time. 

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

WrestlingNerd Presents: WWE Raw Review 7/23/12 (Raw's 1000th Episode)

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at WWE Raw 7/23/12. After weeks of build-up and anticipation, it's time for Raw's 1000th episode. With a ton of hype going into this episode, was it able to deliver or did it disappoint? Let's find out and start the review. 

We open up with a montage of Raw's previous 999 episodes. You got some happy, sad, and momentous occasions. Vince McMahon thanks everyone for standing by WWE during their time and introduces DX. Yeah, the smarks are probably insulting Vince and WWE at this point, but I don't care for any of that. Triple H and Shawn Michaels lead the charge, but realize they are missing members. Out comes Billy Gunn, Road Dogg, and X-Pac to join the group. The only DX member missing was Chyna, but I'm sure this episode would've ended up on Cinemax if she arrived. Damien Sandow interrupts, but I need to get this out of the first. DX One Night Only T-shirt, ONLY 24.95!!! Hey, you knew they were thinking that….CA-CHING!!!  Sandow isn't amused with DX's child antics, so it's that time for five 40+ year olds to take out Ask That Guy. Too bad the robe doesn't give you special powers. The opening was exactly what I expected. It was a way to get the crowd pumped up for the evening since we are gonna be diving into the nostalgic bag often tonight. 

Match #1: Rey Mysterio, Sheamus, and Sin Cara vs Alberto Del Rio, Chris Jericho, and Dolph Ziggler
JR was on commentary for this match. I would've preferred if they had JR called the rest of the evening, but we got to have the traditional team of short-term memory loss, King, and Michael "hearing-loss" Cole. This was a really short match and it ended when Dolph took a cheap shot at Jericho. With Jericho down, this allows Sheamus to hit the Brogue Kick for the victory. Since they have a lot of cameos for tonight, I expect short matches. Why do I get the feeling the IWC is gonna complain TWICE as much after tonight? 

Winner via pinfall: Sheamus, Rey Mysterio, and Sin Cara

You want to know how to blaze by a ton of appearances? Put them all in a bats*** crazy scene, but not before we have Charlie Sheen make an appearance via Skype. Is Raw officially winning? The backstage scene was AJ preparing for her marriage, but everyone is completely off the lid. Appearances by Layla, "Rowdy" Roddy Piper, R-Truth, Jim Duggan, Mae Young, Mae Young's son…..which is a hand. Ohhhhhhhh noooooooo!!! Well, that was worth a cheap laugh. I gotta give them some credit for referencing that. 

Match #2: Brodus Clay vs Jack Swagger
You look to your left. You look to your right. What do you see? Hell if I know, but the match ended during the time you were looking. After the match, Dude Love arrives to dance the night away with our dancing dinosaur. 

Winner via Swagger Squash: Brodus Clay

Trish Stratus gives Yoga training to Trips, while the rest of the DX mocks him. I'm surprised they didn't utilize a fart sound effect. And for some reason, X-Pac sounds like he smoked an entire cigarette factory, or one John Laurinaitis cigar. It's time to do the Daniel Bryan/AJ wedding. The audience is chanting 'No'. Are they chanting that towards the wedding segment, or the entire show? Hephhephhephhephhephheph…….DAAAAAAAA!!! Anyway, she declines the marriage since another man made a proposal. Vince shows up and…..Hey, an interesting development in this whole thing. Well, that quickly goes away when Vince says AJ is the new GM of Raw. Not as promising as Vince rocking the cradle, but this is still a bit of a surprise. I'm not really sure what to make of this. It makes things a little more interesting, considering that her character is still unstable. Unfortunately, that means AJ will get even more screen time, thus leading to more people disliking her. She's personally one of my favorite divas at the moment, but she gets way too much attention. 

A commercial break later, Bryan is still pissed off that he didn't marry AJ. Either that or he regretted going with the white suit. CM Punk arrives to gloat. Random dialogue….THE ROCK SHOWS UP!!! Rock announces that he will be going for the WWE Championship at the Royal Rumble. Well, I certainly didn't expect that. I think it will be fun to see who the champion is at this point. Just when you think Punk is gonna get edgy again, he says the cliche stuff towards Rocky's announcement. Once again, another missed opportunity for Punk's character. Then again, Punk isn't done tonight, so maybe he's got something in store, right? Right? RIGHT? Anyway, time to end this scene by giving Frodo a Rock Bottom. Daniel's not having a good night, to say the least. 

Match #3: Christian vs Miz; IC Championship
We are halfway thru this show and its been what I expected. A ton of appearances from people, a couple of interesting announcements, and very little in the action department. But we still have another 90 minutes to go, so I still think we can turn this boat around and deliver in the action department. Well, it isn't gonna be now since this match didn't last long. Miz hits the Skull Crushing Finale and we have a new IC Champ. The match leaves much to be desired. Well, that's what happens when you want to have a ton of cameos. Then again, I bet those legends aren't complaining since they continue to add to their bank account. As far as Miz being IC Champion is concerned, it isn't that bad of an idea. The Miz has been lost ever since losing the WWE Championship, so this gives him something to do. Christian wasn't doing a whole lot with the IC title, so I can see why you make the change. I still wish to see a new US Champion, but WWE wants to sell over a million Cobras before de-crowning Santino. 

Winner via pinfall and NEW IC Champion: Miz

Triple H comes out and wants to fight Brock Lesnar. Let's f***, Lesnar. Yeah, I've had that one reserved for a while. Paul Heyman comes out instead and still declines the match. Pauly pokes fun of Trips' kids. That's when Stephanie McMahon arrives and she's pissed off that he mocked her children.  She says all these lawsuits are Paul's way of shaking away his failed run as a businessman. I will definitely agree that Pauly was a terrible businessman. The man is a creative genius when writing wrestling, but don't let him handle the business side of it all. She even said her father is better than Pauly. Oh…..Let the comment war being!!! After she slaps Paul (Makes you wonder if the children are watching mommy and daddy right now), Paul gets angry and makes the match. He can't believe she gave the princess what she wanted, but she tackles him. She clearly hasn't done this in a while. It didn't look like a convincing takedown, but it isn't important. Brock arrives and it's time to f***….er, I mean fight. Yeah, I meant to say fight……fight. Yeah, so Brock vs Trips will happen at SummerSlam. I'm really excited to see this match. I think it will be a lot of fun. As voted by the WWE Universe, their dream match is John Cena vs 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin. My personal favorite would be Punk vs Randy Savage, but this is still a nice choice. I guess this counts as Stone Cold's appearance for the night. Best gig ever!!!

Match #4: Heath Slater vs Lita, No DQ match
Slater challenges any legend to a No DQ match. Lita accepts Slater's open challenge, but she hired protection. The APA comes out, along with all the legends that killed Slater over the past few weeks. Lita hits the Twist of Fate….

After she hits the moonsault, she wins the match. The legends are up for joy during this bit. At least Slater didn't say "That's the bottom line" or "Who's next?". At least now, he can have a career….possibly…..maybe…..oh well. 

Winner via pinfall: Lita

Daniel is pissed off at everybody, but calls out Charlie Sheen. Foreshadowing? For some reason, I want to see this confrontation, but I wish Charlie can be more of himself. During his appearances tonight, he seemed pretty sheltered. Part of me feels that it was a missed opportunity, but I guess we should save something up for the next confrontation. Fozzie Bear talks catchphrases….

Well, that's something we can get behind, am I right? "Mean" Gene Okerlund, Zack Ryder, and Cena are backstage. Blah, blah, blah, Rock comes in and wishes Cena luck. Wow, you got more buildup for Rock/Cena than Rock/Punk. Reckon, those plans are way too early to figure out, but I can't help but think Punk is sitting from a distance and screaming, "HEY!!! I'm the WWE Championship. I'm….I'm still important. Can somebody please look at me? LOOK AT ME!!!".

It appeared we were going to have Kane face off against the entire roaster of WWE Superstars until Undertaker makes a surprising return. Yeah, I know it was Kane vs Jinder Mahal, but this sounds better. Drew McIntyre, Tyler Reks, Curt Hawkins, Hunico and Camacho were ready to attack until the Deadman arrived. What's hilarious is they are all ready to attack Kane, but as soon as you hear Taker's music, they just stand still for the next 5 hours. You could've attacked during that time. Hell, you probably could've taken Kane out before Taker was 1/10 of the way towards the ring. Oh, the brilliance of WRESTLING LOGIC. Taker and Kane worked together to take out the WWE Superstars. The Brothers of Destruction returned. I know people will bring up previous storylines involving Kane and Taker, but do you really care? Oh, and Charlie almost encourages Bryan to head to LA for some "Winning". 

Match #5: CM Punk vs John Cena; WWE Championship
Oh King, how you like so show off that lose of memory. He referred to Cena as Superman, but also claimed that Cena was the only one to cash in the MITB fairly….

I understand what King was trying to do while on commentary, but they have these guys come up with some things that make them look pretty silly. While it was longer than the other matches, it was still kept pretty short. The finish comes when Cena hits the AA, but ends up bumping into the referee. Cena has the match, but with no ref to make the count, the match continues. As Cena tries to get the ref back up, Big Show arrives to take out Cena. In the meantime, Punk is sitting in the corner as he watches Show manhandle Cena. Hey, I can't blame him. He's got the best seat to witness Mr. Breakfast Cereal getting his ass whooped. After the KO punch, Punk is conflicted on pinning Cena or doing the right thing. He gets the ref back up and slowly makes the cover, but Cena kicks out at two. Punk lifts up Cena to hit the GTS, but Cena counters into the STF. Oh, come on? Really? No wonder the internet calls him Super Cena. Well, Show comes back into the match and attacks Cena, thus calling for the bell. For the first time, the MITB was unsuccessful. I guess we can call Cena, Mr. Loser in the Bank, if you know what I'm saying. Hahahahahaha……ohhhhhhh, that wasn't funny. Rock gets in the ring to take out Show. He's about to hit the People's Elbow on Show, but Punk takes down Rocky with a clothesline. What? Punk just…..Attacked a good guy? To ensure you it wasn't a mistake, Punk hits the GTS on the Rock. The show ends with Punk leaving with the WWE Championship, while getting a mixed response from the audience. My….My God. Punk appears to have turned to the dark side again. I…..I don't even know what to say right now. WAIT A MINUTE!!! I finally found the words to describe this…..

Yes, yes, yes, yes is right. It is about time. I mentioned for weeks that WWE needed to make an everlasting impression or something big to get people talking about the product. Not only to get people talking, but to get people interested in the 1001st episode. I mean, they didn't get a 1000 episodes by doing nothing. While some claim they saw Punk doing what he did tonight, I think it was still kept in the dark pretty well. WWE did leave a clue a few weeks back when Punk got a little upset over Eve's comment that Punk is being overshadowed by the big names. I can't wait to see Punk's explanation is. I can imagine him saying something along the lines of him being sick of being passed over for guys like Cena, Trips, Rock, Brock, Show, Laurinaitis…….Yeah, he got passed over by a robot for crying out loud. I would be pissed off too if that happened to me. What's strange is people are assuming that Punk is going to play the heel, but I want to see more of his character when he cut that promo last year. You know, that anti-hero/tweener character. In my book, THAT'S what made Punk stand out, and I would like to see more of THAT Punk……not this current Punk. Punk has played a decent face, but it's time for the REAL pipebombs to drop. We all know Punk can play the villain, but I want to see the anti-hero Punk. That's what I hope to see next week. I think most of us can say after tonight that WWE did a good enough job to get you to watch next week. If Punk turned heel, I would say he turned because he never got his ice cream bars. Seriously, where the hell are those things? 

No Contest; CM Punk is WWE Champion/bad-ass

Overall Impression:
Now, I had a feeling that a good chunk of the show was going to be a throwback to what made the WWE get to this point. I think that was evident with all the appearances by various legends in the wrestling business. Oh course, people will be upset about certain people NOT showing up (ie: Ric Flair and Stone Cold), but I was happy with the people that did show up. Of course, you always want to have others that can get the crowd on their feet, but some people are busy with other obligations. Up until Punk's actions, I would say the show was what I expected for the occasion and it was okay, but that all changed when Punk did something. After tonight, we aren't talking so much about Rocky or Cena. We are finally talking about Punk. You know. That guy who's been WWE Champion since Survivor Series. It's about time Punk gets some major coverage on this show. I thought the show was pretty good, but Punk made it a great show. I can see some people not liking tonight's show for various reasons, but that generally seems to happen in the wrestling world. I think WWE pulled a big enough move and got people interested for the next episode. After all, you want to hear what Punk has to say, don't you? Cuz, I know I do. That's gonna do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. If you enjoyed any of my insane ramblings, I advise checking out some of my other work. As always, tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls on the next WrestlingNerd show. See you next time. 

Saturday, July 21, 2012

WrestlingNerd Presents: WWE Smackdown Review 7/20/12 (Friday Night Filler)

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at WWE Smackdown 7/20/12. With one more program before Raw's 1000th episode, can the blue brand help lead the charge for the red brand? Let's find out and start the review. 

We open up the show with Rey Mysterio. He talks about returning from injury until Alberto Del Rio interrupts. Del Rio reminds him that he was the person who took Mysterio out. Really, cuz I thought it was the wellness policy……

That was terrible and I apologize. Once Del Rio started talking about the WHC, Dolph Ziggler comes out and claims he will be the next world champion. Dolph wasn't happy about Del Rio stealing his thunder at MITB since Del Rio screwed Dolph out of getting the world title. The bad guys argue, meaning it's time for the IWC's most hated Irishman to even the score. Sheamus and Mysterio are ready to fight, but Del Rio decides that he left his balls in the locker room, so he leaves Dolph to defend for himself. Dolph almost eats the 619, but manages to dodge the attack. Not a whole lot going on in the opening. They touched base on things that we already know about, but I enjoyed certain elements of this scene. 

Match #1: Prime Time Players, Hunico and Camacho vs Kofi Kingston, R-Truth, Primo and Epico
When I first saw this match, I thought it was going to be one of those clusterf***s that would last about 45 seconds, but they actually gave this match a fair amount of time. It was pretty good to watch. Maybe we are witnessing a tag team division revival? The finish comes when Titus O'Neil pushes Primo off the top rope. Primo ends up falling into Darren Young's Gut Check and the bad guys steal this match. After the match, PTP leave when they hear Big Show's music. Show comes out and kills everyone, but PTP returned for a brief moment and took out Kofi. Show killed the tag teams because……Hunico stole his tacos? Yeah, I have no idea. Then again, I get what they were going for here. Show can't dominate the major players, but he can pick on the undercard. What a visionary!!! 

Winner via pinfall: Prime Time Players, Hunico and Camacho

Match #2: Damien Sandow vs Zack Ryder
Sandow beats up this ignoramus because Ryder is a goof…..you're welcome. Straight Jacket Neckbreaker for the clean victory. Ryder didn't stand a chance against Damien. I mean, how are you gonna beat that beard? That's the intellectual beard, dammit. 

Winner via pinfall: Damien Sandow

We are ready for the Peep Show. Christian introduces Daniel Bryan and AJ to talk about their wedding. The crazy couple show a montage of wedding purchases. I'm surprised we didn't have a moment where Bryan was screaming 'Yes' or AJ was popping her insane pills. Christian decides to make this into Maury and mentions AJ's demon toy, Kane. Bryan vs Kane is up next. Part of me is kinda disappointed. While I had a feeling Kane was the prime person to possibly break up this wedding, I felt WWE gave away too many clues in one night. It kinda takes the fun out of the upcoming wedding segment, but it can still be funny to watch. I guess we will find out this upcoming Monday. 

Match #3: Daniel Bryan vs Kane
This match was fair, but not what I would call amazing. I think if the two had more time, they would've delivered. Considering that these two could be working a program, it makes sense to not make them go all out tonight. Save up for the sequel!!! The finish comes when AJ jumps on Kane, thus causing a DQ. After the match, Bryan tries to save her, but fails. With Bryan on the outside, AJ starts to flirt with Kane and it gets weird again. Bryan eventually pulls AJ away and the two make out on the entrance ramp. Kane's back in this storyline again because he's lonely. I mean, he's REALLY lonely. After a month of not getting any kinky action from AJ, he needs to get back in the game. I know people want to see the Big Red Machine, but he wants the Big Red Condom. Hey, monsters need loving too. 

Winner via DQ: Kane

Match #4: Heath Slater vs Road Warrior Animal
What a rush, alright. And when I say that, I mean this match really was rushed. This was your typical, Slater squash match. I guess he's been watching John Laurinaitis' videos since he used a couple of basic moves to win this match. I wish I can earn a quick paycheck by doing 3-4 wrestling moves. 

Winner via pinfall: Road Warrior Animal

Match #5: Alberto Del Rio and Dolph Ziggler vs Rey Mysterio and Sheamus
Vickie Guerrero and Ricardo Rodriguez had a backstage scene. It ended with Vickie screaming. Yeah, f*** you sound barrier!!! This was probably the best match of the night. Minus the two squash matches, I thought tonight's action was at least fair. The finish comes when Ricardo interrupts Sheamus' Brogue Kick, thus causing a DQ. After the match, Del Rio takes advantage of Ricardo's distraction and applies the Cross Armbreaker to Sheamus. It looks like Del Rio has done the damage, meaning it's a perfect chance for Dolph to cash in the MITB. He actually does it. Holy crap, we have a new world champion. I can't believe this day has finally come. Who would've thought this? Dolph Ziggler: WHC. What a day…..

Yeah, I'm just f***ing with you. Before Dolph can get the ref to make the match, Mysterio interrupts the cash-in and takes out Dolph to end the show. It was nice to see Mysterio back in action. I've always been a fan of his work. I really think Mysterio is an underrated talent. 

Overall Impression:
I'm not gonna lie. This was a very, very, VERY, filler-esque episode of SD. Not a whole lot of new things were brought to the table, but was it a bad thing? Well, not really. Tonight's show did feature some decent wrestling matches and fair development with their storylines, but I will admit that not a whole lot stuck out from this episode. It just seems, kinda there. In fact, there was so little to say about tonight's show that I felt it didn't really deserve to be reviewed. I thought about skipping out on this one, but I decided to give some quick thoughts on the show. I would consider tonight's show average, but I can see why people aren't big on this episode. It's very skippable and can be a bit of a bland evening. They did bring up the 1000th episode, but I felt Raw did a better job to hype up for the big event. Well, I guess we will see how things turn out for the 1000th episode. That's gonna do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it…..Even though this is not one of my better articles. As always, tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls on the next WrestlingNerd show. See you next time. 

Thursday, July 19, 2012

WrestlingNerd Presents: TNA Impact Wrestling Review 7/19/12 (Open Fight Night = Aces and Eights Raping)

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at TNA Impact Wrestling 7/19/12. Can TNA continue the small momentum or is it time to drop the ball for the 124,359th time? Let's find out and start the review. 

We open up the show with Hulk Hogan's stitches, I kid you not. They showed twitter pics of Hogan's kayfabe injury, which was caused by Aces and Eights. Hogan wouldn't make an appearance tonight, but he still manages to find a way to get on the show. Why, you may ask? Because Hogan wanted an easy $50,000. As I'm writing this, Hogan is counting his money……son of a-. 

James Storm comes out and talks BFG Series, how he hates Bobby Roode, and how Aces and Eights has got a stiff warning for their little invasion. Storm challenges Kurt Angle to a match. Oh yeah, it's Open Fight Night…..did anyone else remember that? Cuz I sure as hell didn't. Anyway, the match doesn't happen because Aces and Eights took out Angle. I love the line they uttered at the end, "Aces and Eights, motherf*****!!!". With the way things are going, I feel Aces and Eights are gonna have to choke a bitch. This seems more like an invasion angle. I thought this group was only gonna target Hogan and Sting, but the Kurt attack shows me that they could be overtaking the show. In other words, we are possibly witnessing NWO reincarnation #305. Joking aside, it will be interesting to see where this is all going. 

Match #1: Samoa Joe vs Pope; BFG Series match
We take a break from the main plot of the show to focus on the BFG Series. Ugh….Seeing this match is giving me horrible flashbacks of their rivalry from a year ago. Luckily, the match was kept short. Joe kept checking his jaw during this match. I think Pope kicked him in the face and probably chipped a tooth. Either that, or Joe was going for a Samoan Pirate deal. This is the inspiration for the next Pirates of the Caribbean movie. Joe wins this match with a submission hold. With the victory…..Joe retakes the lead? Didn't he have the lead last week? Oh, that's because TNA didn't explain how Storm took the lead over the weekend. Storm had 43 points, while Joe had 37. There was some other changes in the BFG standings, but if TNA isn't gonna explain the house show points (Which I still think is stupid), I'm not gonna bother. Anyway, Joe NOW has 47 points in case you were lost. 

Winner via submission: Samoa Joe

Match #2: Jeff Hardy vs Robbie E; BFG Series match
Before Hardy can talk, Robbie E interrupts because…….Hardy's face-paint isn't cool? Yeah, I don't care. This match is pretty forgettable. The finish comes when Robbie T gets involved, so this makes Hardy focus on Robbie T. Did you watch this fight sequence? It was really bad, and I mostly blame Robbie T for this. He kinda looked like the boxer in Wii Sports, except you don't throw a single punch. Then again, I suppose that was the point because this gave Robbie E a countout victory. You get 5 points for a countout victory? That seems like a good chunk of points for doing absolutely nothing. This should seriously become Robbie E's gimmick during the BFG Series. The Countout King, currently in production. Why do I get the strange feeling the smarks are gonna overly complain about this scene? It's just a hunch…….Oh well. 

Winner via countout: Robbie E

It's time for the Gut Check…..ohhhhhhhhh noooooooooo!!! Sam Shaw is tonight's competitor. He has a generic look, cuts a generic promo, and gets a generic beat-down by Aces and Eights. Yeah, Shaw is definitely going places, like the generic unemployment line. I'm kinda glad they did this. I guess after weeks of miss potential with the Gut Check, Aces and Eights decided to give you a break. I like these guys already. 

Match #3: Mr. Anderson vs AJ Styles; BFG Series
Tazz said that Styles can make a mistake and it still looks awesome….

Yeah, I beg to differ. After a screwy head-scissors (D'oh, I missed!!!), the finish comes when Anderson counters the Styles Clash……with a pinfall? Yep…..a pinfall. I'm guessing it was supposed to be a rollup, but it sure didn't look that way on television. Yeah, it looks bad when you see it. After the match, Claire shows up and bitches out Styles. Once again, she gives a really bad acting performance. This is the norm for her, so you might as well accept that this is the best she can do. She confirms that the child is AJ's because they were both drunk and they had a loooooooooonnnnng night. Don't drink large amounts of alcohol kids, cuz if you do, you will end up in a terrible, TNA storyline. She even showed photos of their night of homewrecking. In every photo, AJ looked completely passed out, while Claire was smiling in every shot. For someone that was supposedly drunk during all of this, she can still operate a camera and her eyes are wide open. Yeah, who took these photos? Yes, this storyline gets worse and worse as it continues. I mean, we have plot-holes up the ass with this whole thing. These segments are so bad, but you can't take your eyes off of it. The IWC will beg to differ since they probably created five million forums to talk about how much they hate this segment. I can agree that it's hammy, over the top, and completely ridiculous, but I find it funny since I want to see all the stupid stuff they can add to this segment. Let the stupidity flow through you….


Winner via not giving a s***: Mr. Anderson

Match #4: RVD vs Christopher Daniels; BFG Series match
Daniels wins this match after RVD misses Rolling Thunder. Yeah, time for that WRESTLING LOGIC since the referee didn't bother to look at Daniels' feet since they were under and over the ropes. I don't see nothing, alalalalalala. I see nothing, alalalalalalala.

Winner via shenanigans: Christopher Daniels

Austin Aries mocks Roode's attitude from last week. Then again, it looked like he dived into his inner, Macho Man Randy Savage. Joseph Parks is talking to Garett Bischoff about legal advice. Yeah, cuz you want this evil spawn to know legal stuff. We question who was the guy that Joseph turned into when he delivered the Black Hole Slam to Bully Ray. Joseph denies all claims of a split personality. This is another storyline that's getting really silly, but it's not the worst transition Abyss has gone through….

Match #5: Bully Ray vs Magnus; BFG Series match
I think I just figured out Magnus' gimmick. He has multiple personality disorder since he will be a good guy one week, but an asshole the next. This match wasn't too bad. The finish comes when Magnus misses the elbow drop, in which Bully counters with the solo 3D/Diamond Cutter/RKO/Cutter for the victory. With the win, everyone involved with the BFG Series officially has points. 

Winner via pinfall: Bully Ray

Match #6: Bobby Roode vs Austin Aries
I should mention that TNA signed Chavo Guerrero and he will arrive next week. I'm surprised this signing didn't happen sooner. Chavo has always been a talented worker, but he isn't what I would call a major signing. Still, It will be interesting to see what he can do. Roode vowed he would call out Aries and…..He did. Yeah, they kinda forgot one of the concepts for OFN since they didn't defend one of the championships. I guess if the Hogans can't determine who gets the title shot, then nobody does. This was probably the best match of the night. I really like these Bobby/Aries matches. I really want to see this continue for a while longer. The finish comes when Aces and Eights arrive and attack A Double. Tazz and Tenay think they have it all figured out since Bobby is enjoying the attack. After they have done the dirty work, Bobby wants to shake the hands of Aces and Eights, but they start to attack Bobby. The show ends with Aces and Eights continuing the assault. I love Tazz's line of Total Nonstop Anarchy. I bet he had that saved up for a whole week. Thank you, brain. So, I mentioned in the beginning that it seems an invasion is occurring in TNA. I know veteran wrestling fans are getting tired of seeing this storyline, but I always tell people to give it a chance before judging it. I would like to see them add a different spin to the invasion storyline. Right now, I'm at least interested to see what Aces and Eights can do. Of course, this stable can turn into a gigantic face palm, but we will get to that if it happens. 

No Contest

Overall Impression:
I would consider this a pretty average episode of TNA. This was definitely a night for establishing Aces and Eights. Before tonight, this stable was only targeting the retirement home, but that completely changed. I think they wanted to establish Aces and Eights as a dominate stable that want to overtake TNA.  I personally wasn't big on the first hour of the show. The matches were forgettable and the flow of the show wasn't really there. The second hour was improved since I felt the development of certain storylines were better and the match quality improved. This isn't what I would call a watcher, since tonight was all about Aces and Eights, but it was passable. Tonight also didn't fully utilize OFN. The Gut Check got glanced over and there was no championship match, but this strangely might have been the best edition of OFN ever. It's funny how you take away certain concepts of a gimmick and it makes the show better. I would keep going on about this, but I will stop before I piss off people who enjoyed the traditional OFN. That's gonna do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. As always, tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls on the next WrestlingNerd show. See you next time. And if you wonder why this review is done early, it's because Batman's awesome. 

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

WrestlingNerd Presents: WWE Raw Review 7/16/12 (FOOLED YOU!!!)

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at WWE Raw 7/16/12. After the events of Money in the Bank and the 1000th episode set for next week, how does WWE look going into the show? Let's find out and start the review. 

We open up the show with CM Punk. What? Punk opening up Raw for a second week in a row? I thought Money Night Cena didn't allow that type of stuff on their program? Yes, I'm just joking around. Did anyone see the opening shot of John Cena winning the MITB match? Was that the best Cena photo they had? It's Derpy Cena, coming at ya. Punk talks about his pipe bomb from a year ago, hits title defense and how he plans to be champion at the 1000th episode. Big Show interrupts and claims nobody cares about Punk since people would forget about Punk after a week because this show revolves around one person. Well, at least the WWE is self-aware of what they're doing. You would think Punk would get angry and maybe cut one of those pipe bombs, but he says the typical, school spirit crap. Remember when Punk was controversial and anti-establishment? I want to see that guy again, but I feel that guy is gone. I'm still a big Punk fan, but he has lost all his edginess and became a generic good guy. Show says Punk will eat those words because he vows Cena will cash in the MITB tonight and steal the title. In case you are lost, it was announced at the beginning of the show that Punk vs Show would happen later tonight. So, they were building up the main event for tonight. I was thinking of the possibility of Cena cashing in the MITB, but that got thrown out the window after Show mentioned it. In fact, you would see WWE mention this again…..and again…..AND AGAIN!!! Okay, there's being subtle, and then there's this…..

I get what you're trying to do here, but is it really necessary to shove it down our throats like this? Hey, remember when surprises happened? I want surprises again. Well, I'm getting ahead of myself here. Despite what I said, this was a pretty good opening segment. Really enjoyed Show's mic work during this scene. And for some reason, the King decided to become Porky Pig. WW….WW…WWE…..Youtube…..blubblublublublublublub. 

Match #1: Kofi Kingston and R-Truth vs Prime Time Players; WWE Tag Team match
DX's 1001st reunion will kick off the 1000th episode next week. I really hope they can get other DX members BESIDES Triple H and Shawn Michaels to take part in this. AW continues to be out of control with the headset. He was a little funny tonight, but I want to see him go over the top. After all, it would make sense considering you got 'millions of dollars, millions of dollars' at your side. This was a fair match, but nothing too special. The finish comes when AW causes a distraction, but it backfires since Truth hits Little Jimmy for the victory. After the match, AW takes my advice and loses it. You know, for being a promoter, he's doing a terrible job at it. Might want to think about getting Don King to help you out there. PTP aren't ready for the tag titles, so I don't have a problem with them losing tonight. Plus, they have managed to keep Primo and Epico in the tag division and not throw them out the window. It might be confusing trying to figure out what's going on with the tag division, but at least they are doing something with it. That has to be worth something….right? 

Winner via pinfall and still WWE Tag Champs: Kofi Kingston and R-Truth

AJ and Daniel Bryan are in a backstage scene. Bryan apologizes for his beard and jackass nature. Eve interrupts because she wants to get back and Bryan for abandoning her. Bryan and AJ vs Eve and a partner of her choice. Apparently, payback is a AJ. Payback is an AJ? What does that mean? Is payback a crazy person? Is payback a short girl? Ohhhhhh, payback's a-.

Match #2: Alberto Del Rio vs Zack Ryder
Ryder should be called the Long Island Jobber. LIJ is something people can get behind. Maybe form a tag team with the Brooklyn Brawler. What, you can't see it happening? Del Rio wins with a quick Cross Armbreaker. After the match, Rey Mysterio returns and delivers the 619 to Del Rio. If you remember the established kayfabe, Del Rio was the one who took out Mysterio. Thus, it makes sense for him to attack Del Rio since he wants revenge. Since it looks like Mysterio/Del Rio is gonna get started, I wonder who will be the guy to go up against Sheamus? Hmmm….what? I'm thinking. What, I'm not allowed to think anymore? 

Winner via submission: Alberto Del Rio

Match #3: Heath Slater vs Rikishi
Slater immediately calls out the legend and it's Rikishi. Stink Face, Samoan Spike, and Rump Shaker for the victory. After the match, the lights go off. Rikishi joined by this sons, Jimmy and Jey Uso, to dance the night away. Before we had a dancing dinosaur, we had Rikishi. The One Man Band is gonna start going costal. He's gonna get killed world wide. I'll keep you up to date with his touring schedule. 

Winner via pinfall: Rikishi

Match #4: Daniel Bryan and AJ vs Miz and Eve
The finish comes when Eve has a rollup on AJ, but Bryan reverses it as the ref's back is turned. Yeah, I'm convinced that the rollup is the most devastating wrestling move ever. Nobody can break out of it…..

After the match, Bryan admits that he needs AJ and that he loves her. He makes another marriage proposal and gives her a ring. AJ says….

Well, I guess Bryan's dead. She says 'yes' and they are engaged to get married. After a commercial break, we find out that the marriage will happen next week. Damn, that was fast. Will AJ have like three kids and be smoking by next week? It feels rushed, but I guess that was the idea. Not really sure how I feel about this marriage deal. I would think Bryan has something up his sleeve, but I have no idea what will come out of this. Well, at least this wouldn't be the stupidest wrestling marriage we've seen this year…..I hope. 

Winner via pinfall: AJ and Daniel Bryan

We were about to have Ryback vs Jack Swagger, but Swagger attacked before the match officially got started. He starts to do well, but Ryback fights back. Ryback eventually kills him with a bunch of powerbombs. Well, at least they are upping Ryback's competition. After four moths of murder, it was time to give him some fresh meat. Remember when Swagger was important? Wait, he was important? Dolph Ziggler comes out to brag about winning the MITB match. Chris Jericho interrupts this segment, but Dolph cuts him down. He talks about how Jericho's return has been a bust and maybe Jericho doesn't have it anymore. Jericho started off smiling, but he eventually started to get angry…..Almost as if he passed a kidney stone. Well, he relieves his frustrations by hitting the Codebreaker on Dolph. So, it appears Dolph and Jericho are beginning a feud and Jericho has made a possible face turn. I really look forward to seeing this unfold. It should be a lot of fun. 

Match #5: Brodus Clay vs JTG
I thought JTG got fired already? He also had a different look towards him, but it doesn't change the fact that it's a miracle that he's still getting a paycheck. Brodus hits Funk It. You know how they are moving Ryback towards bigger competition? Well, how much more can you get away with a Brodus squash match every week? Reckon, you can't compare Ryback to Brodus. Ryback is a serious character, while Brodus is mostly a comedy character. Still, the squash matches really get old after a while. Then again, I'm sure casual fans don't really give a s*** about those things. 

Winner via pinfall: Brodus Clay

Match #6: CM Punk vs Big Show
To my surprise, this match wasn't that bad. This was your David vs Goliath match. I think with all things considered, Punk and Show pulled off a passable match. Punk did manage to get Show to the ground and hit the Flying Elbow, but can still only get a two count. If only you had your supply of Cena Pebbles….Something about that sounded wrong. The finish comes when Show pushes the referee to the ground. The ref issues Show a DQ. After the match, Show continues to assault Punk. Cena finally arrives and it looks like he's gonna cash in the MITB. Cena says he will NOT cash in MITB tonight since he wants to use it for the 1000th episode. Show calls Cena a fool for doing this the honorable way, but Cena doesn't seem to care. The show ends with Cena hitting Show with the briefcase, and having a stare-down with Punk. So, it appears that Cena will go down the boy scout route and cash in the MITB fairly. Well, there goes that idea that Cena would do something evil. I knew it was a slim chance, but I wanted to mention it since I know people were being very negative on Cena's victory. Now that they have made the match official, I wonder what will end up happening. At the moment, I see Punk retaining his championship. I think it will involve some type of interference with Big Show. Kinda throwing this out there, but I think a Triple Threat match for the WWE Championship will happen at SummerSlam. Hey, crazier things have happened. 

Winner via DQ: CM Punk

Overall Impression:
I thought with all things considered, this episode of Raw wasn't too bad. It definitely was better than last week's show. Then again, I think watching Cena on the toilet for two hours would've been better than last week……maybe. The show did hype up the 1000th episode and did announce a number of things for the event. We have a WWE title match, a wedding, an IC match (Voted by the fans), and a number of legends for the event. I wouldn't call this a great Raw, but I would consider it a pretty average, filler episode. Tonight's action wasn't really there, but that tends to happen after a PPV. They didn't establish too much in terms of new storylines, but I have said before that they are probably saving things up for the 1000th show. I've talked about the 1000th show before and I think my feelings on the show are still the same. If WWE doesn't deliver something big or jaw-dropping, it could be looked at as a disappointment. They are gonna have a lot of people checking out the momentous occasion, so I think they have to have something saved up for the event. Of course, the show can bomb, but we will save that for next week's Raw review. That's gonna do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. As always, tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls on the next WrestlingNerd show. See you next time. 

Monday, July 16, 2012

WrestlingNerd Presents: WWE Money in the Bank 2012 Review

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at WWE Money in the Bank 2012. Despite this PPV not having the best buildup, was it able to deliver a watchable show? Let's find out and start the review. 

Match #1: WHC Money in the Bank Ladder match
We open up with the blue briefcase match, but let's talk about the pre-show first. Kofi Kingston and R-Truth went up against Hunico and Camacho. I'm not sure if this was a Championship match or not, but any knowledge of that would show that I care too much about this match. Hunico keeps saying he's the future of the WWE. Yeah, more like future endeavor of the WWE…..

Truth hits Little Jimmy on Camacho for the victory. For a pre-show match, it wasn't too bad. We also see Santino make a mini-briefcase for his Cobra…..that's just inappropriate. Anyway, on with the real show. 

To open up the PPV, this was a fair match. At the same time, I did notice a couple of slip ups during this match. Now, I'm not one of those people who's gonna nitpick every match. These moves are hard to pull off, and I bet some IWC nitpicker can't even pull off a quarter of the moves these guys can pull off. Seriously, it pretty much proves that the internet will literally complain about EVERYTHING. Oh, did I just say that out loud? With that said, I felt the one person in this match that seemed out of place was Santino. He missed a couple of very noticeable spots in this match. I think this was the first time Santino's competed in a ladder match (Don't quote me on that), and it definitely showed. I don't think he should be involved in another ladder match again. Despite a few mistakes, this was still a good match. Tyson Kidd, Christian, Dolph Ziggler, and Cody Rhodes delivered some great spots. Damien Sandow was decent in this match, so how about giving him an opponent now? Tensai even looked decent in this match. I'm surprised that Sakamoto didn't help out his boy in this match. I'm starting to think Sakamoto is one of those people that gets off on people beating him up. Hey, Tyson is about to win. I'll take Tyson!!! I'll take Tyson!!! Oh, only about three people are gonna know what the hell I'm talking about. We even got shades of last year when Tensai powerbombed Sin Cara through a ladder. Is this Sin's gimmick? The finish comes when Dolph finally pulls down the briefcase. This obviously made the most sense. They have been hinting at Dolph getting the leap into the main event for a while, so this doesn't come as too big of a surprise. I'm happy for Dolph, but I hope the worse doesn't happen now that he has won the briefcase. 

Winner: Dolph Ziggler

Match #2: Sheamus vs Alberto Del Rio; WHC match
You know that Smackdown gets underplayed when almost all of the SD guys are competing in the first hour of the show. Now, I can see a lot of people not caring for this match since the buildup has been very basic. I thought this was a good match to watch, but I can see people not caring for this contest. It mostly has to do with the fact that Del Rio was mostly in a filler role for this match, as opposed to looking like somebody that could take the championship. The finish comes when Sheamus hits the Brogue Kick for the victory. After the match, Ricardo Rodriguez and Del Rio attack Sheamus. It looks like Sheamus is down. Dolph comes out and is about to cash in the MITB, but Del Rio argues with him. Dolph knocks him out with the briefcase. Just as Dolph hands the briefcase to the ref, Sheamus is back up and hits the Brogue Kick on Dolph. Since the ref never made the match official, it doesn't count. Dolph still has the briefcase, but part of me is disappointed. Dolph stealing the title would've shown a glimmer of WWE NOT playing it safe and thinking outside the box, but that wasn't the case. Instead, they remain on this predictable route and let Sheamus walk out with the title. Then again, part of me is glad they didn't do the cash-in tonight since it makes it wide open for future events. Still……what could've been.

Winner via pinfall and still WHC: Sheamus

Match #3: Prime Time Players vs Primo and Epico
Kofi and Truth were on commentary for this match. I love how AW throws Mexican slurs towards the Puerto Ricans. Kofi and Truth were calling Titus O'Neil a horse face. So, what does that make Darren Young? A horse's ass face. The Prime Time Horses…..or Horsey. This was a fair match, but nothing amazing. The finish comes when Primo gets a rollup on Darren for the victory. After the match, AW brags about being the #1 Contenders. They walk up to Kofi and Truth, but Truth uses the ultimate weapon of H2O to embarrass AW. Some people might complain about the approach of having the #1 Contender lose this type of match, but I think this is a better approach. It seems they want to establish the PTP as a heel tag team, but they also want to have Primo and Epico remain in the spotlight. There was a time where 3-4 tag teams would be featured on the show, so I'm glad they are showcasing at least 3 tag teams at the moment. Maybe the tag division really is making a comeback? Only time will tell. 

Winner via pinfall: Primo and Epico

Match #4: CM Punk vs Daniel Bryan; NO DQ match for WWE Championship
During the interview with AJ, she talks about Punk's rejection and Bryan's asshole nature. She cares for both of them, but feels like ripping out their……ripping out their what? 

Yeeeeeeaaaaaaah……So, it appears the WWE MITB ladder match is gonna be the main event. I'll save that rant until we get to that match, but I'm almost convinced that its in John Cena's contract to be in EVERY PPV main event. Early in this match, AJ gets knocked down and sent to the back. For the majority of this match, she wasn't a factor. With a backup ref involved, that's when Punk and Bryan started utilizing the rules. A kendo stick and table got in the picture. Punk and Bryan really go out of their way to deliver a good match. I still consider their match at Over the Limit to be better, but this is definitely a close second. In my book, the best match of the night. After a while, AJ arrives since she left her crazy medication behind. She actually gets a chair and drops it between Punk and Bryan. I thought she was gonna start doing a strip-tease in the middle of the ring. She's basically toying with both of them. After a ton of counters, the finish comes when Punk hits a Back Suplex from the top rope and through a table. Punk is still the WWE Champion, while AJ didn't seem to be that big of a factor in this match. It does raise the question, what's the point of having AJ involved in this match if she didn't do much? I will agree that her involvement in this match didn't really do much, but I'm glad they took this approach. It was time for AJ to move on to something else, plus I think WWE just wanted to conclude this rivalry once and for all. I saw a lot of internet complaints for AJ not being involved in the match, but I'm also convinced that they would've complained if she was in the match too much. Yeah, there's no winning in that situation. Personally, I'm glad they kept AJ's involvement to a minimum since it made the match better. After tonight, I can see AJ having more feelings/concern for Bryan because of how she seem to detest Punk after the night. Then again, AJ's entire character can literally make you do this every week…..

Winner via pinfall and still WWE Champion: CM Punk

Match #5: Ryback vs Curt Hawkins and Tyler Reks
Just like SD this past week, Reks and Hawkins were actually taking it towards Ryback. He did get knocked around a bit, but Ryback still wins with the Shell Shocked…..

Winner via pinfall: Ryback

Match #6: Layla, Kaitlyn, and Tamina vs Beth Phoenix, Natalya, and Eve
Still odd to see these matches AFTER the two world title matches. Then again, I'm convinced that Cena's ass is made of gold, which would explain why he's above both world titles at the moment. Winner and NEW Champion, John Cena's Ass. Layla wins with the Lay Out. This whole division doesn't make any sense to me, but most of you know that I gave up a while back in trying to piece this puzzle. Not even Banjo Kazooie could put together this puzzle. I mean, why is Natalya heel again? I don't know, nor do I care. It's gonna take a number to really fix this division. Yikes!!!

Winner via…..something: Layla, Kaitlyn, and Tamina

Match #7: WWE Money in the Bank Ladder match
As I mentioned earlier, this was the main event. I normally wouldn't have a problem with this. After all, the name of the PPV is MITB, so why not have a MITB match close it? Well, I think my biggest issue is the fact that Cena is ONCE AGAIN in the main event for the PPV. That's now SIX straight PPVs that Cena has closed out. Remember when the WWE Championship closed out the shows? Well, that hasn't happened since WWE TLC, which was back in December of 2011. It really underplays the value of the WWE title when it gets pushed back this much. I forgot to mention that Miz showed up after the WHC MITB match and put himself in this match. I liked Miz's promo. He was more calm and collective. I kinda want to see them explore this character a little more. Apparently, Miz has been away to deal with sequels from bad Cena movies. That's a fate I don't wish upon anybody. In the early going, everybody worked together to take out Big Show. They capped it off by having Cena hit the AA through the Spanish announce table. Rest in Peace: Spanish Announce Table #3056749. We will miss you the most. After the attack, Cena, Kane, Miz, and Chris Jericho all pile a ton of ladders on top of Show. I guess you can say that Big Show's being buried……

It didn't last too long, as Show would eventually find his way back in the ring and introduce his special, fat-boy ladder. By the way, did anyone else think the ladders looked very cheap? Yeah, you can tell WWE had a shopping spree at Wal-Mart recently. This was a fair ladder match, but it shouldn't have closed out the show. It was definitely the weaker of the two ladder matches. The finish comes when Cena finally pulls down the briefcase. Yep, Cena wins……yet again………yeah? No? Okay, let's dive into it. I will admit that I really didn't want to see Cena win this match. I respect Cena and I don't hate the guy, but the overexposure can really make it seem like a drill is being shoved down your throat. That would be the Cena 'drill', if you know what I mean. Then again, let me try to get you to think down a different direction. It's often that the MITB holders eventually make heel turns. More often than not, MITB does wonders for the bad guy. Here me out here. What if Cena cashes in the briefcase in a heel fashion? If he does that, that would certainly get people interested in Cena. It's possible for Cena to cash it in and NOT become a bad guy, but I'm trying to give some of you some food for thought. Hell, we can even hope for Cena to be the first to NOT win the championship…..right? It could happen, so there is a positive for Cena winning tonight. Still, I know people are gonna be very upset with Cena winning this match. He really didn't need to win and it probably would've been more interesting if somebody else had won since it would be different. This PPV was predictable since I got every prediction right. Reckon, I don't care for my picks, but I shouldn't be getting all of these picks right. I really have to hope for a big surprise at the 1000th episode or this can be a loooooooooonnnnnnnnnng year. 

Winner: John Cena

Overall Impression:
Even though I just said this PPV was predictable as hell, it wasn't that bad of a show. Now, I will say that the previous MITB PPVs were better than tonight, this was still a fair edition in the MITB series. The show featured some pretty good action. The Punk/Bryan match was really good, and the two MITB matches were fair to watch. The four main matches did deliver in the quality department. You get those high spots that you're used to seeing with MITB and I was entertained by most of the matches. The biggest issue I have with tonight's show was the predictability. There was no plot twist or a swerve to get you invested in tomorrow's Raw. This was the definition of a show playing it way too safe. In fact, the last few WWE PPVs have been played safely. When will we get that "OMG" moment? When is that enticing storyline gonna happen? When am I gonna be at the edge of my seat as I watch a great storyline play out? For these last few months, its been anything BUT that. Now, I think the reason for that is because the WWE is saving up for the 1000th episode, but by putting all the investment in one show, you're possibly setting yourself up for disaster if you can't deliver in this department. I think they needed to space things out evenly. What if this 1000 episode bombs and they DON'T deliver that big storyline/swerve? It would make everything that's happened these last few months look even more ridiculous. I'm generally not big on putting all of your eggs in one basket, but I guess we will see when this episode comes out next week. If I have to give WWE Money in the Bank a score on a scale of 1-10 and 5 considered average on this show, I would give this show a 7 out of 10. Some may think that's too high for this PPV, but I did get an enjoyment out of tonight's action. Some will question the booking, but I try not to grade a show based on the booking itself. If I did that, I would probably be one of those IWC members who complains about 90% of the product. Tonight's PPV featured some great wrestling action, but the predictable nature of the show can lose your interest, so don't say I didn't warn you. That's gonna do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. If you enjoyed any of this non-sense or my stupid opinions, you can check out some of my other work. Tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls on the next WrestlingNerd show. See you next time. 

WrestlingNerd's Official Score of WWE Money in the Bank 2012: 7 out of 10