Monday, May 20, 2013

WrestlingNerd Presents: WWE Extreme Rules 2013 Review

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today we take a look at WWE Extreme Rules 2013. Was the PPV a success or a flop? Let's find out and begin. 

Chris Jericho vs Flamboyance 
Look at Wade Barrett during the pre-show. He looks so bored out of his mind. I bet he's thinking, 'Where's my career?' as he's sitting there trying to do analysis. At least Miz is holding up to his name as Mr. Pre-Show. He wins another pointless match. If you win enough of those, you might graduate from the bottom of the ladder. The first match of the night is Chris Jericho vs Fandango. This match looked a more fleshed-out than the previous encounter, but I'm not saying anything bad about the first match. Either Fandango raided Randy Savage's grave or ate Toucan Sam and shat him out on a pair of pants. I was actually surprised for Jericho to pick up the clean victory with the Walls of Jericho, but it makes sense….If you wanted this rivalry to continue. I honestly don't have a problem with this feud continuing since it has been a decent rivalry. Still, I thought they would continue to pile Fandango's victories, but no point in building up undefeated streaks when they ultimately go nowhere in the wrestling business. Don't believe me? Go talk to Crimson about that…..

Exactly my point. 

The Kofi Kingston/Dean Ambrose match was pretty damn good. I thought they didn't make Kofi look that bad, while showing what Ambrose can do on his own. Ambrose hits his finisher and he picks up the clean victory to become the new US Champion. As soon as this happened, the internet has completely blown up in thinking this is the single move that's gonna save one of the mid-card championships. In my view, it's hard for me to say that since the WWE hasn't done anything involving character AND storyline development with these belts since Zack Ryder won the US Championship. Ryder was US Champion? Yeah, that seems like something that happened eons ago, but I digress. I would like to think that WWE will start an actual storyline with this championship since Shield has been dominate for these past few months, but don't be surprised if Ambrose literally holds it until the next Flavor of the Month is ready to take the belt. There's definitely a ton of potential with Ambrose being the US champion, but only if WWE's willing to invest the time into building up mid-card gold. Since there's no such thing as professionalism on the WrestlingNerd page, let's jump ahead for a second to talk about the WWE Tag Team match. The match was contested under Tornado Tag rules. The rules to the match is everyone is involved and the concept of tagging in and out is out the window. In other words, what you pretty much see every single week in TNA's tag matches. Anyway, this was another decent match to watch. So far, the action has been pretty good tonight. Nothing mind-blowing, but at least it's entertaining. The finish comes when Roman Reigns shouts his way towards the tag titles…..

That would be the funny way of doing things, but it actually ended with Rollins and Reigns doing a combo finisher on Bryan to win. Something about that finish didn't seem well rehearsed. I just don't think Bryan was supposed to take that type of fall. Is Bryan still have a voice box after that? Any further and I think you would've slapped Bryan's beard right into the grandstand. Anyway, the Shield has won two championships and seem to be on their way to controlling WWE….sort of. I think Shield has a good balance. You got Ambrose, the talker. Seth Rollins, the over-seller. And Roman Reigns, the shouter. RANDOM SHOUTING!!! It definitely seems WWE wants Shield to mean something and I look forward to seeing this angle play out. It would be something if they ever take one of the world titles, but can't do it all in one night. Regardless if you hate the stable, you have to admit giving them gold gives them more ammo for future events. 

Strap-on for some fun….yikes!!!
Just as I freakin' predicted a week ago, WWE did do that stunt where all three guys touched the corner, but they actually didn't have the match end. To my surprise, they interrupted the predictable outcome to keep things going. I almost like to think WWE was trolling longtime wrestling fans since every strap/bullrope match has ended in the same fashion. It's actually clever if you think about it, but it isn't really that big of a deal. Wow, you got a white guy whipping a black guy and somebody being tied up. Slavery AND bondage all in one showing!!! It comes full f***ing circle!!! Sheamus picks up the victory. Why? Because that's what WWE creative does! 

Mandatory filler for the evening
AJ and Kaitlyn resort to the Magikarp playbook as they flail like crazy. Yeah, flail away divas! Flail away!!! Not really sure why WWE cancelled the Divas Title match, but do you honestly care? I think of this as a blessing in disguise. I think Randy Orton should be known as the Filler Man. That's what he's been doing for the past four months. Is anyone really interested in Orton/Big Show? Do you really think this was a Extreme Rules match? It honestly didn't feel like one. Then again, my definition of Extreme Rules is using swords, maces, and guillotines, but can't please them all. Orton wins the match in the blandest way possible. Why was this on the card? Oh, because WWE needs to whore out to the hometown favorites. 

National Dumbass League
Oh boy…..This match. This match! This match…..This was something else. Why did the referee ask every 20 seconds if you quit? What, did he get an extra dollar in his paycheck for every time he said this? Needless, it got annoying very quickly. The contest wasn't that bad. It was silly, but there was still something entertaining about it…..Until we got towards the end. Colter framed Ricardo by throwing in the towel, which allows the referee to declare Swagger as the victor. After the wrestling logic referee persuades the other referee to look at the replay, he decides to restart the match. I honestly don't see the point of any of this. What the hell is the point of doing the instant replay scene if Del Rio ended up winning the match 2-3 minutes after the restart? Was John Cena not done with his cereal yet and they had to stall for time? Oh, and gotta love that anti-climatic finish. Seem this has been happening a lot in the WWE lately…..or consistently…..or always…..shut up! Now that I'm done talking about that, let's dig into this 'instant replay' deal. I know they did this stunt to show Swagger/Colter being bad guys, but there's other ways to do it. You're desperate for plot conveyance if you need to resort to instant replay. Seriously, it's a stupid idea and somebody needs to punch the moron who thought this was a brilliant idea. I'm all for having a good laugh at ridiculous wrestling skits, but instant replay is just retarded. I would honestly harp on this less if they didn't have the ref resort to instant replay. If the second ref came out and over-ruled the other ref to restart the match, that would've been perfectly. It's still pretty dumb, but at least it would be a little funny. 

Ryback Rules Steel!
The John Cena/Ryback contest wasn't that bad. I know a lot of people complained about the finish, but I don't think it was that bad. Don't get me wrong. It doesn't make a whole lot of sense since the idea of the match is to be the last one standing. The fact that Cena got carted away means he lost. You lose, Cena!!! Technically Ryback didn't stand on his own since he was helped by the refs, but that should be good enough to declare him the winner. I'm sorry, Cena, but you get nothing! You lose! Good day sir! I know they wrote this up because they wanted both guys too look strong without suffering a defeat, but I honestly don't think the scene justifies the ending. A guy got tackled through a wall? How many times have we seen that and nothing happened? Oh well…The ending may be a little screwy, but I'm okay with this approach. The match was fun and I look forward to see this unfold. Oh, and we can't go one night without one stupid line by the commentators. Comparing this to Mick Foley's drop from the Hell in a Cell is…..

Jerry Lawler: Now on a comedy tour.

Cage Match 
Brock Lesnar and Triple H was pretty enjoyable. I personally thought this was the best match in the Lesnar/Triple H rivalry. I've talked about how the first match two matches couldn't tell a story in a wrestling ring (Not to be confused with storytelling via promos/segments. They are two different things), but I felt they finally got it right tonight. There were many moments were the nitpicker would say 'Why don't they just walk out the door?' This is what you do to that person….

F*** that s***!!! These two guys simply wanted to beat the crap out of each other and dammit was it appropriate! Lesnar sold the leg injury very well and I think added a lot more to the match. In fact, I think he sold it too well….

Trips' downfall was introducing the sledgehammer. Speaking of which, why does that sledgehammer look so fake? Where did you get that thing? The Dollar Store or Wal-Mart? Pauly sneaks in a low blow, which allows Brock to finally take control of the match to end this rivalry. This was the best way to go. While they're both part-time performers, I think Brock had more of a reason to win this match since he's a little more consistent than Trips. I also liked the ending where Brock gave Trips the sledgehammer. It was almost a sign of respect if you think about it, but that's kinda scary since Brock Lesnar hasn't expressed an emotion other than anger since the early 2000s. This was definitely the match of the night in my book.

Overall Impression:
Extreme Rules wasn't that bad. In fact, this was a vast improvement over WrestleMania 29. The matches were better, more memorable, and just flowed a lot more than WM 29. That's not to say that ER had some low points. The Orton/Show match was just straight up boring and the Sheamus/Henry match was pretty much the equivalent of a Divas contest (FLUSH), but I look at this and I find myself interested in what will happen on Raw this past week. I liked this PPV, but it feels like something's missing from this show. I think if this PPV had one more big moment that I would highly recommend checking out, but this is still worth checking out if you allow yourself to have a little fun. If I have to give WWE Extreme Rules 2013 a score between 1-10 and 5 considered average, I give it a 7 out of 10. I may be giving this PPV a point higher than what it's worth, but I'm giving them that point since this made up for WM 29. The less I remember that showing, the better! ER 2013 contains matches that will be talked about and had action to back it up. It even had some quirky moments that were silly, but funny because it's pro wrestling. That does it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. Tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls in the next one. 

WrestlingNerd's Score for WWE Extreme Rules 2013: 7 out of 10


  1. I would say Wal-Mart.

  2. the swagger finish was the worst thing all year.
    del rio wins.
    they see that coulter threw it, and thus, del rio wins because coulter threw the towel!
    WTF!??! how did they go the ONLY illogical way with this??
    not to mention they have to justify why they dont do instant replays in every match now (which would make heels basically lose 100% of matches because wwe has no strong heels), but of course the 'fanbase' wont care about logic in their wrestling show.
    at least in tna there is still logic where a guy goes from vice president to threatened murdervictim after losing one match, after the whole gang lost matches for months after months-
    now im depressed... maybe i should start watching something else...

    1. sorry, i meant to say swagger in line 3... you get what i mean.

    2. Now why would Del Rio win if they saw that the hick through a towel?! Swagger didn't quit (at that point), so he shouldn't automatically lose.
      1. Ref comes from the back and says that Coulter threw the towel and he restarts the match.
      or 2. They go to the "instant replay" to confirm that Coulter threw it.

      Option 2 makes sense if you believe (like I do) that WWE was making fun of the sports culture in general; specifically baseball, and their TERRIBLE use of replay.

      WWE has made fun of the way actual sports does things in the past, so why should Sunday night be any different?

  3. Paul Heyman guy.May 26, 2013 at 3:17 AM

    Dude you sound like a mark these days....