What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at TNA Impact Wrestling 8/16/12. With Hardcore Justice over, how does TNA move forward? Let's find out and start the review.
We open up the show with Austin Aries. He talks about winning his title defense and how he tells people to fluk yourself. Jeff Hardy shows up and continues to give you nightmares with his face paint. Looks like something you would see in Majora's Mask. Anyway, Hardy says he will win the BFG Series, but wants to deal with Aces and Eights for screwing him over at the PPV. Bully Ray comes out and brags how they are all blind and James Storm is clearly behind the attacks. Funny, since I was thinking that Bully could be involved with this stable, but I digress. That was pretty much the opening. It was kind of a weak opening. It talks about the main storyline, but it doesn't feel very evolved. In many ways, the opening was just there.
Match #1: Magnus vs Samoa Joe; BFG Series
We get a recap of the BFG Series matches at the PPV. SHAKY CAMERA!!! What, did the editing crew have a stroke in the middle of creating this? This match was kept pretty short. The finish comes when Joe gets a rollup victory on Magnus. Joe now has 61 points in the BFG Series. After the match, Magnus is so pissed off that he attacks Joe with a chair. Wait, that's not right. He attacked Joe with a f***ing chair!!! Yeah, Magnus is in a bad mood because the Olympics are over and out of London.
Winner via pinfall: Samoa Joe
Madison Rayne is excited about her celebration because she wants to have cake. As she's gloating about her celebration, Brooke Hogan comes out and says Madison will have to defend the title against Tessmacher tonight, and Earl Hebner won't be the referee. Oh, come on Brooke. I think you're being too harsh on Earl. The man's just really horny. Is that a crime….Don't answer that question. In other words, the cake is a lie. Yeah, you knew that was coming. Brooke gets in the ring because she wants to prove that Hogans are tough. Well, Madison retreats, but that doesn't stop Brooke from quivering like a mouse when Aces and Eights show up. There's that Hogan toughness, out in the open. We were also told that Earl won't be the referee for KO matches anymore. Senior official, my ass!!! As & 8s thinking about spreading Brooke until various TNA talents arrive to save her. We head into a commercial break since Brooke is no longer needed for this scene. I love how you have a bunch of talents to save her, but most of the disappeared once they got back after commercial. What, is there a limit for how many people can show up in an hour? Sting says they call out As & 8s for next week's Open Fight Night. The evil stable says that they love the idea and will show up, but not before they make their presences felt tonight. Now if you excuse them, they go back to a poker game that's more interesting.
Match #2: AJ Styles vs Christopher Daniels; BFG Series
This storyline never seizes to amaze me. Styles adds a stipulation to this match. If he loses, he accepts that he's the father of Claire Lynch's baby. If Styles wins, he will take a test. Oh, so NOW common sense comes into play? I guess Styles wants to give himself a challenge and prove his innocence…..In the stupidest way possible. I know the good guy will stack the odds against themselves, but this is kinda sad. I know people are gonna call this nitpicking, but I just find it hilarious that they have managed to make Styles' character look even dumber, AND make this storyline even more atrocious at the same time. That takes a rare talent. In fact, I bet Daniels will be revealed as the father based on how things are going. Anyway, the matches are at least decent to watch. That's a positive, right……RIGHT? The finish comes when Kaz tries his best Solid Snake impression and conceal himself from holding down Styles' leg for the three count. I love how the ref didn't see any of this and calls off the victory. I just find it funny how the referees start to develop a brain at certain moments……WRESTLING LOGIC. Styles hits the Pele kick and wins this match. This storyline….why why why why why why why why?
Winner via referee: AJ Styles
Sting is getting excited that Hulk Hogan will be back next week to deal with As & 8s. Yeah, cuz that went so well the first time. What the hell does doing things 'old school' mean? Are they gonna bring back the zombie edition of the NWO? Is Hogan gonna bring out the real American? Bobby Roode comes out to cut a promo. He reflects on what happened at the PPV and how the referee, A Double and Sting all screwed him over. Bobby talks about how much he needs the championship and how he can't live without it…..
Bobby knows what he has to do, and that's to drop the mic. Well, that gives new meaning to the term, 'pipebomb'. In all seriousness, this is Bobby's way of getting another world title match or working a new program. I guess the only thing to do is sit back and watch. I'm sure regardless of what happens, Bobby can find a way to make it interesting.
Match #3: Madison Rayne vs Tessmacher; KO Championship
Gut Check guy for next week. Hey, I don't care. Brooke brings out Taryn Terrell and falls on her ass. I guess she thought As & 8s were around the corner or that ramp is the best wrestler of the evening. Yeah for Taryn…..I guess. Why should I care about this character? I don't even know who she….wait a second? She looks familiar. Well, based on research, she worked under the name Tiffany in WWE. So, that would explain why she's familiar. Guess what? I STILL don't care. Anyway, Taryn calls the match down the middle and Tessmacher is champion again. I guess the whole Madison/Earl deal was building up to Taryn? Yeah, that one makes you think.
Winner via pinfall and NEW KO Champion: Tessmacher
Match #4: Jeff Hardy vs Bully Ray; BFG Series
It was established in an earlier scene that Storm would be watching this match to keep his eye on Hardy. Either that or he was plotting how to get the facepaint off his face. I know I keep going back to that, but it's creepy. This match was decent to watch. The finish comes when Hardy and Bully are down. Aces and Eights arrive and look like they are about to attack Bully, but the old-man calvary comes out to save the day. Aces and Eights retreat, which allows Hardy to hit Twist of Fate for the quick victory. I love how seconds after taking a finisher, Bully is back up to attack Hardy. Bully questions Storm being involved. Storm about to hit the Last Call on Bully, but ends up hitting Hardy. Once Bully leaves, As & 8s give Storm a round of applause. Wow, I cringed at Tazz and Tenay's 'acting' during this part. This makes Claire Lynch credible. Anyway, the stable attacks Storm. Yeah, so it wasn't Storm all along. Are you surprised? Well, you shouldn't be. I'm still under the theory that Bully Ray is controlling the stable, and that he's tricking people to think otherwise. Well, it's time for a plan B since Storm can no longer take the blame game…..or can he? So much for the old saying, "Innocent until proven guilty". Isn't there a lawyer on this show?
Winner via pinfall: Jeff Hardy
Did anyone else feel that tonight's show went by quickly? Yeah, I really thought it felt short, but that's generally a good thing. If a show feels long, that usually means it's dragging. At the same time, tonight's show felt like it was just there. I know I've been saying that a lot, but I don't think a ton stood out from tonight's program. If there's one thing they did a good job in, is trying to get you to watch next week's show. Storm has been ruled out for calling the shots, and we seem to have a fight on the way to start off next week. In fact, the main storyline is probably the only reason to care about tonight's show. Yeah, there was the introduction of a female referee, but is it really that big of a deal? There was also Bobby walking out of the ring. Actually, that's something worthy paying close attention to, so this was okay too. The in-ring action was lacking, but it's common to get lots of promos for episodes following a PPV, so I can let that slide. The show isn't bad, but it wasn't great either. Well, that's gonna do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. As always, tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls on the next WrestlingNerd show. See you next time.