What is up wrestling fans, I am the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at TNA Impact Wrestling on 6/30/11. I wasn't really looking forward to this showing because CM Punk's promo pretty much guaranteed he would make the biggest splash in the pro wrestling world. Well, let's just see what TNA can do and begin the review.
We open up the show with a bug dying on screen. I am not joking. This was shown on tv to show Eric Bischoff as a cockroach/cancer that Sting was talking about last week. After that bit of nonsense, we see a quick backstage scene of Hulk Hogan being happy about the fact that Scott Steiner as agreed to join Immortal. Once Steiner is gone, we see a video being played with Sting's cryptic message. Damn, how much more can the Sting rip off from Heath Ledger's Joker? All he is missing is the purple suit and sticking out his tongue at random moments. At times, it does seem like Sting is doing the tongue thing. Anyway, Hogan makes his way to the ring and says Sting has made a bad mistake, but he first wants to talk to Mr. Anderson. Once Anderson arrives, Hogan tells him to either join Immortal or do things the hard way and fly solo. Hogan claims Anderson will lose the title to the JokerSting, but Anderson says otherwise. Hogan says Anderson owes Immortal while Anderson says he doesn't owe them s***. Since this whole conservation was going nowhere, we are interrupted by the titantron and we see Sting beating up Immortal. Kinda funny how Immortal is this all powerful stable and they can't even handle one crazy guy. Anyway, the lights go off in the arena and then Sting appears right behind Hogan. Sting hits Hogan with the baseball bat and Anderson runs away. Sting grabs the mic and says he will deal with Anderson later, but he needs to talk to Hulk first. While Hogan is trying to recover, Sting talks about how he used to idolize Hogan, but then he became all about Hollywood and that mumbo jumbo. You know, after coming off of CM Punk's worked shoot and then seeing this, it really puts it to shame because Sting has said this many times and Punk proved he is probably the best talker in the business today. In other words, stop with the worked shoots TNA. Sting then grabs a bottle of vitamins and shoves them down Hogan's face because as you all know, throwing vitamins is hardcore......gosh (well, you do need your vitamins at Hogan's age.....and pudding). He also locks in the SDL and just when you think this segment couldn't have gone on any longer, here comes Immortal to the ring and they have something to say. Bully Ray says it will be Steiner vs Sting later tonight, which FINALLY ends the segment. Overall, this open was ridiculously long and I personally wasn't really high on it. Then again, I suppose it did its job and sets up what will happen for the evening. Still, this opening ended up being close to 20 minutes long. I should note that Impact's theme tonight was to do the show with limited commercial interruptions. Why did I have this feeling TNA was just going to cluster it all together and still not give you enough time to process what you just saw with the last scene/storyline? One of TNA's biggest flaws is having too much stuff going on at one time, but I suppose we will wait later in the evening to see how it turns out. Oh, and there was a quick update with the BFG Series. Yes, they are still doing some of these matches at various house shows. I am sorry, but with something like this being billed for your biggest PPV of the year, the majority of the audience should see it and it should not be shown in some stupid house show. I like the idea of the BFG Series since it puts a lot of value into the matches, but I feel they are already overloading it because the scoreboard is already out of hand since they are off screening some of the matches. Imagine if WWE held the Royal Rumble, but only to around 1,000 fans, no cameras or broadcasting, and the only way you find out who wins it is by them telling you it was so and so? That is a stupid idea, and so is putting these types of matches in house shows. It belongs on tv, not off screen. Ok, enough ranting about that or else this review will never end.
Match #1: Samoa Joe vs Devon in a BFG Series Match
I still stand by my original thoughts in saying Devon has no business being in this tournament. The matchup was ok, but nothing that was a watcher. Still, it was fair for what it was. Joe is trying to do a submission everytime because he wants to earn some extra points. I think someone should have told Joe he has three plus months to rack up some points and this tournament isn't going to be won today. This isn't Majora's Mask where you have three days to save the world, so what's his damn hurry? The finish comes when Joe makes a slip up, which allows Devon to hit a Rock Bottom and he wins the match and points. So far, only Joe, Robert Roode and the Pope have 0 points. I wonder if they are going to have someone go this entire tournament without earning any points? In fact, I want to see someone lose some points just for the hell of it.
Winner via pinfall: Devon
Backstage scene of Pope celebrating with Devon's kids and says he wants to congratulate him. Where is this Pope/Devon storyline going? He is trying to get to Devon's wife? Are they forming a new tag team? Better question, do you even give a s***? Another backstage scene of Steiner being angry for Bully not telling him about tonight's match (When did Bully get the power to make matches? Wrestling logic). Bully gives him a pep talk and gets Steiner fired up for tonight. This scene serves no purpose to the show and was a waste of time. One more backstage scene of Kaz confronting Joe and telling him he has been off his game lately (yeah, like for about two years if you ask me) and this gets Joe a little angry. Security staff separates them and that ends the scene....for now. Wow, this rivalry was just thrown together at the last moment and you can tell because you can't buy any of the tension between the two. It is funny how this security staff can hold off one pissed off samoan, but can't handle a bunch of KOs. Anyway, it's time for the X Division tournament match.
Match #2: Matt Bently vs Low Ki vs Jimmy Yang in X Division Tournament
Wow, it has been a while since we have seen Low Ki. For you WWE fans, Low Ki went by the name Kaval. Jimmy Yang was also called Jimmy Wang Yang in WWE. You have to admit that Kaval/Ki got a raw deal in the WWE, but he should have known it would be a struggle since he is a small guy. The match was pretty fun to watch. Lots of highflying action, which is what the X Division is known for. Pretty fun match and I can recommend watching this one. The finish comes when Low Ki hits the Warrior's Way for the clean win. It was pretty clear Low was the favorite tonight by the audience. Also, when is WWE going to admit NXT is a failed concept? Look at the "winners". Wade Barrett is stuck in limbo, Kaval got released, Kaitlyn is somebody nobody cares about, and Johnny Curtis is still the Master of Bad Puns. I am just saying...
Winner via pinfall: Low Ki
There was a backstage scene with Angelina Love and Winter. It appears Love is acting normal again, but is now acting like a heel and talks about dealing with Mickie James. So, after all this time with this zombie deal, what was the whole point of it? It just seems like a big waste of time since she was a zombie for two months, but now she is fine with no real conclusion. Way to be lazy TNA. We also are now in some random bar and it appears Joe and Kaz are brawling. This brawl had about the same video quality as the Joe/Crimson brawl a month ago. Why is this rivalry even happening?
Match #3: Angelina Love, Winter, and Madison Rayne vs Miss Tessmacher, Tara, and Mickie James in a Elimination Match
Because wrestling matters, we now have a long, drawn out, KO match to present. Even Tessmacher's entrance music sounds like something a stripper would dance to. They couldn't make this seem subtle, could they? Anyway, the finish comes when Love and Winter and double teaming Mickie, but they both get into an argument in who should score the pinfall. Because of this, this allows for Mickie to recover and she somehow eliminates both and wins the match. I guess they are started to put some friction between Love and Winter. I don't know about this. Love just barely started acting normal, and now they are instantly going to break them up? There is no consistency with this storyline, makes no sense, and is all over the place. What a mess. Then again, in Russo's world, this storyline couldn't be going any smoother.
Winner: Mickie James, Miss Tessmacher, and Tara
It was announced that Abyss would put the X Division title against Brian Kendrick at the PPV. You figured with a PPV centered around the X Division, they would put some emphasize on the freakin title, but it was all put together in a little video package and we have yet to see Kendrick and Abyss confront each other since the Slam PPV. Come on TNA, you can do better than that? We are back in the ring for the contract signing between Christopher Daniels and AJ Styles for the Dest X PPV. It appears Styles was worried about making this match since he didn't want Daniels to lose his mind if he lost. Daniels says he has nothing to do with that and its about the X Division. Styles seems ok with it and we have a match. So, your probably wondering what was the point of the contract signing if there was barely any insight for future events? Well, Jerry Lynn would come out and says he is sick of hearing how the X Division was made by this or that guy and claims it was made by all of them. RVD comes out and says he is a little "teary eyed" and says he was X Divison before it was around. I think at this point all four guys are challenging each other in who can deliver the worst promo. We now have RVD vs Lynn at the PPV as well, which is a rebirth of their famous rivalry in the original ECW. It was also announced there will be a 4 Corners Match between RVD, Lynn, Styles, and Daniels on next week's Impact. Somewhere out there, an IWC is jerking off with all of these updates. To be serious (and I know that is difficult coming from me), this could be an interesting match. Does anyone else suspect a Daniels heel turn based on Styles' feelings? Anyway, it appears everyone is gone and Styles is the only one left and he is high fiving people until Gunner attacks him. They get back in the ring and the brawl goes on for a while until Styles wants them to ring the bell and we have a match. It was reported earlier it would be Styles vs Gunner, so at least this makes a little bit of sense for the Gunner attack. It also appears these guys have a mini-feud based on the house shows. Now, that sounds like a great idea for a rivalry. So, why are we not getting all the matches on tv? You see what I mean about doing these matches off screen? Just not a bright move.
Match #4: Gunner vs AJ Styles in a BFG Series Match
The match went on for a while. It was ok, but it is possible you may have missed this one because of the fact that there wasn't too many breaks in between segments. I hope TNA doesn't do another show with limited commercial interruptions because it is hard to digest what is going on in a fast paced manner. Why did I have this feeling TNA would overload their storylines tonight? The match ends when Gunner uses some heelish shenangians and hits the F5 for the win. It was also shown that Gunner is currently leading the series. I am sure after TNA's next waive of house shows, that is going to change. Still, Gunner is making a splash, but he needs a new name. Just picture this....#1 Contender for the world title goes to Gunner? Just sounds weird.
Winner via pinfall: Gunner
Velvet Sky had a backstage scene where she talked about how she used to be picked on and claims she has had to climb mountains in the business. Are you serious? I am not sure if this was an actual story by Sky or it was just her playing her character, but can you honestly buy this sob story by Sky? She is attractive and I refuse to believe SHE of all people was getting picked on in high school. It must have been the high school the cast of "Mean Girls" went to? Why am I making THAT kind of reference? Anyway, after the WrestlingNerd going a-wall, Mexican America came to the ring and talked about how they are not getting the titles shots and they are trying to keep them down (Really? Is it a conspiracy?). British Invasion interrupt and say they should face off against them since they have never beaten them. They also say the winner gets the next tag title shots, but want the ladies banned from ringside. This starts a brawl and it appears the Brits are in trouble until Rob Terry comes out for the save and they run away. Well, at least SOMEONE out there cares about the tag titles. I really like Magnus talking. We need more Magnus on this show and less crap involving the Jarretts. Speaking of the devil, we see a video of the Jarretts in Mexico enjoying their vacation and claim they will be back in a couple of weeks. What the hell? Well, I guess Kurt Angle didn't specify the stipulation and thus Jarrett is already on his way back. Why can't things seem to make sense on this show? I know it is wrestling and wrestling logic is always going to be questioned, but this is beyond logic being thrown out the window since they will say and do anything and don't seem to care about continuity. Oh, and nice to see Karen is up and healthy after almost being killed a month ago. There was also another backstage scene with Immortal. I normally wouldn't have brought this one up, but it appeared that Abyss took off his mask and now can't seem to find out. Ok, my questions is why the hell is Abyss doing taking off his mask? I thought he wanted to hide himself from the public of his real identity? Damn, he must really trust Immortal to actually reveal his actual face. Abyss the whole time was wearing a towel over his head and in panic mode searching for the mask. I guess we are to assume that Kendrick stole the mask and is going to use this to his advantage for their upcoming match. Still, it makes no sense that Abyss would ever take off his mask. What's next, Batman going to rip off his mask in front of Gotham City, or Rey Mysterio going to leave his mask at the airport? This is ridiculous. Maybe he shoved it up his ass...I apologize for that...
Match #5: Sting vs Scott Steiner
It is really bad when the combine age for your main event is over 100 years. The match was slow and boring. The finish comes when Stinger hits the SDD for the win and continues to rip off John Cena's Superman act with pulling off miracle victories at the last second. After the match, Bully attacks Sting, but it fails. Anderson hits a low blow and leaves while Immortal continues the attack. Hogan is "running" down the ramp (we need to get Hogan a wheelchair or something to make him move down the ramp faster. Maybe they can build something near the ring to make Hogan rise from the ground like Michael Jackson from the Thriller Tour. I am just saying it would save a lot of time if we didn't have to see Hogan "charge" down the ramp) and he is ready to us a baseball bat on Sting until Angle comes in for the save. The show ends with a staredown between Angle and Hogan. Not really sure where Angle fits in all of this, but he does have a legitmate heat against Hogan since Jarrett is with Immortal. I am just glad the show ended with something that resembles how a wrestling show to end and not with a round of interviews.
Winner via pinfall: Sting
Not really a great Impact, but parts of the show were tolerable and watchable. This week's Impact did feature some decent wrestling matches and they helped the show. I felt what hurt the show was some of these promos and how silly some of the storylines can get in TNA, but I think that is pretty common. I was actually getting bored while watching this week's episode, but I think that is because I knew there was no way that TNA would be able to do better than what Raw did this week. Let me rephrase that, there is no way TNA could have done better than what Punk did this week. Overall, not a bad week for Impact and this might be looked at as one of the better showings for TNA, but nothing really leaped out at me with this show. I did mention some of the matches were good, but nothing that was an absolute must see. What also hurt the show was the opening. It just went on way too long and they needed to cut it down. I hope TNA doesn't plan on having too many showings with limited commercials since I felt there was not a moment where I could take a break. This was one of those special occassions, but hopefully they don't do it again because we need a break as wrestling fans. As I said last week, I just can't buy Sting's current crazy character. It just seems out of his nature, and it might have something to do with the fact that he has been around forever. Imagine if Hogan started doing this gimmick....ok, well ouside of the crazy, old man routine he has been doing lately. It would totally be different for a long time wrestling fan to digest and I think that the reason I am not liking this new Sting. Plus, it is almost a crossover between Ledger's Joker and Cesar Romero's Joker, and I think that is even too silly for a wrestling show. Then again, why so serious? That is going to do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. As always, tell me what you thought of my review and tonight's show. You can also check me out on blogspot/blogger. I will see you guys and girls on the next WrestlingNerd show, see you next time.