Monday, December 17, 2012

WrestlingNerd Presents: WWE Raw 12/17/12 Review (Slammy of Shame)


What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at WWE Raw 12/17/12. How do the Slammys fair? Let's find out and start the review. 

Match #1: Damien Sandow vs Rey Mysterio
We open up the show with this match. Rey wins by hitting a crossbody. Oh, we're starting the show like this? Not only did the match breeze by, but I really have to question why Rey won this match. Rhodes Scholars are the #1 contender and they just beat these guys last night. The ideal thing to do is end this rivalry and move on to Team Hell No. Instead, you get this strange booking that doesn't do anything. Rey and Sin Cara are still out on the outside looking in, while RS are thinking about gold. This match shouldn't have even taken place. I can understand trying to give Rey and Sin something, but there are better ways to do it. And it seems that Damien is becoming the being of sporadic skill set. How can he take Sheamus and John Cena to the limit, but struggles against Rey? I know this is one of the biggest examples of wrestling logic, but it bothered me since Damien was going over in singles competition just a few weeks ago. Booker T came out to give a Slammy to Kofi Kingston since the fans voted for him. As always, there's gonna be some disagreements when it comes to the Slammys. Honestly, are you surprised? It isn't like we should be taking the Slammys seriously. It's a fake award show on a staged wrestling product. It really shouldn't surprise you in who gets these things. They also use these things for storyline development, so it isn't about actually acknowledging the best of 2012. That's why I encourage people to take part in the 3rd Annual WrestlingNerd awards. It's like the Slammys, but done with dignity…..I think. And for some reason, the Boogeyman showed up to interrupt this segment. Yeah, you know the WWE is pulling out all the stops if they bring the Boogeyman to make a cameo. We could be in for a looooooooooonnnnng night. 

Winner via pinfall: Rey Mysterio

Match #2: Eve vs Kaitlyn
If you want to know who won the Slammys, look them up. I'm not gonna talk about who got what and the results since I already gave my opinion on the Slammys in general. I will only bring up the Slammys if they effect certain scenes. Either that or it's something worth mentioning. So, now we get the match that should've happened last night. Kaitlyn wins this match cleanly. I really don't like this storyline. It's so lazily put together and…..No, it's just plain lazy. They talk about it one week, don't mention it for weeks, and now talk about it again? My head hurts. 

Winner via pinfall: Kaitlyn

Match #3: Kofi Kingston vs Tensai
So, how is DX in the category for Comeback of the Year? Where did they comeback from? A bathroom break? Come on, there's a DX reunion every year. Oh, and how isn't Tensai in the running for this award? I mean, he just had the greatest year ever. Am I right? Kofi wins with the Trouble in Paradise since Tensai is wondering what went wrong when he decided to come back to WWE. After the match, Wade Barrett attacks. UGGGGGGGH!!! Are you kidding me? Are you freakin' kidding me? Actually, I'm not even shocked they would continue this. Don't get me wrong. I like Wade Barrett and I want to see him used better, but he really shouldn't be going after the IC Championship. This rivalry is about as well done as the Antonio/Truth rivalry. Oh boy. 

Winner via pinfall: Kofi Kingston

Kiss of the Year, or as I like to call it, the AJ Lee Award. They totally designed this so AJ has another interaction with Vickie Guerrero. Geeze. This is becoming the storyline that doesn't want to die. It's pretty funny that the winning kiss turned out to be the worst kiss I've ever seen from this company. I think Cena was confused when he made that kiss. AJ claims she doesn't have to explain anything. You know, AJ is quickly becoming the character on this show to detest the most. I like her, but WWE has gone overboard by putting her in everything. Simply put, I'm "AJ'd out". I've seen enough and I wish they would present her in small doses again. So, AJ continues to be bat s*** crazy when she makes out with Dolph in a matter of seconds. I'm honestly not surprised this happened. In fact, I thought this would've happened last night. Because of this altercation, Vickie and Dolph would continue to argue for the whole night. In many ways, it was the theme of the whole show. Welcome back to another edition of 'The Young and the Fruity Pebbles'. Part of your complete breakfast. 

Match #4: Khali vs David Otunga
If you knew who won this match, then I feel sorry that you had to watch this contest. We're moving on and I regret nothing. 

Who won? Who gives a damn 

They are presenting WWE Superstar of the year now? I guess they wanted to make sure kids voted for their hero before their bedtime. Cena wins the vote and the internet is not gonna let this go for the next year. Cena claims he can't accept the award and instead gives it to Ric Flair. So, the WWE Superstar of the year is giving to a guy who worked for TNA most of the year? Well, that's a first. CM Punk comes out to complain about the injustice of this voting. Hmmm….injustice…..pro wrestling…..NXT….Coca-Cola….Well, this leads to a scuffle between Flair and Punk. I think the highlight of the show was Punk doing the Flair strut. I''m being serious with that statement. An elderly man vs a man with one leg. If that isn't the match of the century, than I don't know what is. Flair talks about how great it is to be back until the Shield arrive. So, I guess the injustice this time around was working for TNA? Oh, the TNA fans are gonna tear me a new one with that comment. Oh, and if you're wondering why I'm not acting surprised by Flair's return, it's because WWE spoiled it. In fact, the editing of tonight's show was really bad. Why is it that the Shield attack before a commercial break, but you come back and Team Hell No has arrived to help out? Where's the transition? Where's anything? What's going on here? We should be excited for Flair's return, but it just passed by as if it was nothing. Normally, the editing or the commercial breaks are fine, but tonight's show went to commercial break at the wrong times in many cases. I guess you can argue it was like that because of the Slammy voting. Even if that was the case, there's no excuse for miscues like this. It makes you look very amateur-like with your presentation. I'm sorry, but WWE dropped the ball in this department. 

Match #5: Brodus Clay vs JTG


Winner via pinfall: Brodus Clay

Match #6: Cody Rhodes vs Sin Cara
At least the LOL moment of the year award got a good laugh, and it had nothing to do with Santino and Tensai. Thank you for Team Hell No. Fat Albert, huh? I bet it took Santino three months to come up with that one. So, now we have this match? Did the creative staff even remember what happened last night? Cody ends up winning this match in uninteresting fashion. Apparently, they will get a tag team title match on Main Event this week. While it adds something to Main Event, I kinda wish they would save this for an upcoming episode of Raw. It just seems like a missed opportunity since tag team wrestling is doing so well right now. 

Winner via pinfall: Cody Rhodes

What was the point of hashtag of the year? It just seemed like an excuse to get Zack Ryder to say his stupid catchphrase. I love how they mention the WWE App and there's a mixture of boos in the audience. Even I have to boo this shameless plug. This might be worse than Kurt Angle's Five Hour Energy deal on Impact……No, no it isn't. Big Show comes out to take about being the world champion, while Sheamus tries to be a good sport and shakes his hand. After Show teased Sheamus, Super Irishman takes out Show with the giant chair and the Brogue Kick. Dolph is about to cash in the MITB, but Cena attacks Dolph before it happens. I was pretty excited when I saw Dolph run down that ramp, but that instantly went away when I saw Cena arrive to break up the party. If you cock block Cena, he makes sure he ruins it for everyone else. Oh, what a missed opportunity. It would've been a great time for him to cash it in, but Cena proves he's the superstar of the year by trolling you. I was sadden by this result. 

Match #7: 3MB vs Alberto Del Rio, Miz, and Tommy Dreamer
Child in the audience: Mommy, why are they chanting, "ECW"
Random parent: Shut up and drink your juice box. 

First the Boogeyman and now Tommy Dreamer? All we need is Funaki and we have the show of the year. That's right. Let's get this party started!!! YEAH!!!

I love Dreamer's look as he begs for a tag. That's the look of a man that's screaming, "Come on man!!! I need this. They told me if I got the pinfall, they would give me a pizza. I want pizza!!!". Dreamer hits a DDT and picks up the victory. I can't buy Del Rio as a good guy. He acts like a prick most of the time, but seeing him do what the fans want is just strange. This is just a strange transition. The strange case of Alberto Del Rio. 

Winner via cooking: Tommy Dreamer, Alberto Del Rio, and Miz

Match #8: Ryback vs Antonio Cesaro
Ryback may not be WWE Champion, but he gets the consolation prize of winning, not one, but TWO Slammys. Yeeeeeeeaaaaaahhhhhh….sigh. Just like any match for tonight's show, it was short and unmemorable. Yeah, the action really took a backseat tonight, but that's actually normal for the Slammys. Ryback wins this match via countout. Feed me swiss cheese!!!

Winner via countout: Ryback

In the back, Shield attacks Dreamer and Ricardo Rodriguez. The injustice this time around was Dreamer not sharing his pizza. As for Ricardo, his injustice was for Del Rio's weird change of attitude. Seriously, Del Rio's actions absolutely make no sense. Feel the touch of Vince Russo. Noooooooo!!!

Match #9: Dolph Ziggler and AJ vs John Cena and Vickie Guerrero
Oh, so I forgot to mention Vickie booking this match since her and Dolph seem to be having some issues. Just as AJ is about to explain herself, Vickie interrupts….

Dammit, I was hoping Vickie would've finally shut up. In minutes, AJ walks out on this match and so does Vickie. Dolph is thinking about leaving since he's thinking about the possibility of a threesome, but Cena keeps this match going. Cena has Dolph in the STF until AJ arrives with….Rydark? Ryblack? Blackberg? Yeah, I can do this all night, but we need to wrap this up. Big E Langston shows up and attacks Cena. As you would've guessed, the man's built like a beast. So, the first question to pop into your head is who in the hell is Big E Langston? Well, that's exactly what I said. Apparently, he's another NXT talent that's been called up to the main roster. I don't know anything about this guy and his credentials. So, I will just give my thoughts on the guy as we continue to see more of him. Now, I actually like this ending since it gives a rookie the chance to be featured on this show, but with everything else that happened tonight, this wasn't that great of a debut. Hard to say where this is going, but I'm at least somewhat interested to see what this guy can do. 

Winner via DQ: John Cena

Overall Impression:
The Slammys should get some type of attention since there was a craptastic game on ESPN, but there still wasn't a whole lot to keep you intrigued with this show. Like I said, TLC was great, but this wasn't a good way to build off of that. The matches were forgettable and boring. Outside of Flair and the real legends at the end of the show, the cameos were very uninteresting. Seriously, the Boogeyman? Was the Shockmaster booked up? I'm really growing tired of AJ. That's saying something since I've usually been high on AJ, but her last few storylines have really made me dislike the character. I was hoping for more build with the Shield. Sure, they were on the show, but I was hoping they would do more. After all, they just defeated Team Hell No and Ryback in a TLC match. Who's idea was it to keep the Shield more sheltered this week? Langston's debut was 'meh' at best. Yeah, I just didn't get much of an enjoyment out of this evening. I know Slammy episodes tend to be pretty bad, but it almost felt like they weren't trying. It's almost as if these shows were written by two different people when you watch TLC and then tonight's show. One person who did their homework and put on a good product, while the other person smoked pot and just hoped for the best. It was almost surreal watching this since we just saw TLC last night. If you liked the show, that's okay. Everybody has their own preference, but I really advise avoiding this episode. That's gonna do it for the review and I hope you got some enjoyment out of this. As always, tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls in the next one. 

8 comments:

  1. Shitty review. Zero positives? Hmm.

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    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    2. If you would READ the review, than you would've seen some of the few positives I wrote. You're welcome.

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  2. I got to say the "new/returning guy/group attacking Cena at the end of the show as their debut" routine is REALLY getting old.

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  3. An interesting trend I have been noticing with the NXT guys who have recently debuted on the "main shows". First we had Seth Rollins of the Shield who was the reigning NXT Champion then at the recent NXT taping he lost the title (which will air some time in January) to Big E Langston. I wonder if that trend will continue with whoever will be the third NXT Champion.

    As for Big E, I hope he is molded in to the new Mark Henry (when he was world champ) rather than the new Bobby Lashley.

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  4. you've seen just about all that Big E can offer, he's only had squash matches despite being on nxt for a while, hasn't really shown all that much ability, has only spoken a handful of times and each time he showed why he shouldn't speak and the only interesting thing about him, which would be the King Kong Bundy 5 count gimmick, is probably not going to follow him onto the main roster.
    They have all these interesting and skilled people on NXT and they bring in the guy that fulfills Vince's muscle man fetish that doesn't have all that much to offer

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    1. So, he's the equivalent of Bobby Lashley? Well, that makes me a sad monkey.

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  5. Ohh, Come On !!! how many such squash rookies does WWE have.
    I am disappointed with this move.
    When the hell is rickie the dragon's son coming in the main roster ??
    He is in NXT too right ??
    Or was that TNA ??

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