What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at TNA Impact Wrestling on 12/22/11. Since I'm still insane and want to like this show, let's find out what they did this week. Let's just start the damn review already.
We open the show with Robert Roode and Bully Ray. Both guys talk about Christmas and how they like giving beatings for the holidays. Giving beatings? Oh, I'm sure there isn't an innuendo in that sentence whatsoever, but it isn't like you get enough innuendos with the KOs. Anyway, Roode talks about how Sting likes to issue consequences when he oversteps his boundaries. He actually purposes Sting to suspend him since he feels he deserves it. If TNA suspended Roode, I think I would have to break something since he's one of the few bright spots on this show. Instead of Sting showing up, Jeff Hardy interrupts. Hardy talks about ending the selfish generation at Genesis and mentions it will be Roode and Bully vs Hardy and a partner of his choice tonight. Bully goes on a rant in how Hardy has no friends, which cues the fangirls to go nuts over Hardy. Sting shows up in the face paint and says he will team up with Hardy tonight, which ends the segment. Very short opening, but it was harmless. Roode and Bully at least make this scene interesting while Hardy "tries" to cut a short promo. By the way, why is Hardy looking like Goldust tonight? Hey, wrestling fans automatically think of Goldust if you go with gold and black makeup. Just a thought.
Match #1: RVD and Christopher Daniels vs AJ Styles and Kaz- Wildcard Tournament match
For the love of Jesus Christ on a tap dancing stage, why is this RVD/Daniels rivalry still going on? This is another one of TNA's issues, but it also falls on the creative staff. There has been so many times this year where TNA had a rivalry that was over and done with; but instead of moving on to a different rival, they would keep it going for no apparent reason. Why? TNA, learn to pull the f***ing plug already. RVD and Daniels had two matches and RVD won both. What would get accomplished for this charade to continue? Damn, this is one of those rivalries that I should've put in the Worst Rivalry of 2011. Then again, it isn't too late. RVD and Daniels were on opposite ends throughout the match. Daniels is barking orders since he feels this will give him a personality (Guess what? It doesn't) while RVD just goes with it. He eventually gets sick of Daniels' crap and kicks him in the face. Kaz hits a finisher and wins the match for his team. So, Styles went from working a program with Roode, to that stupid overtime, now to this Wildcard deal? I'm not the biggest fan of Styles, but don't you think it's a bit insulting to work a main event program to now this gimmicky tag team deal? I'll let you think about that one.
Winner via pinfall and moving on in Wildcard Tourney: Kaz and AJ Styles
Match #2: Zema Ion vs Tony Neese; Best of Three series
This is the second match of the best of three series. So, TNA called him Anthony and now want to call him Tony? I'm aware he goes by both names, but TNA should pick a name and stick with it, or else it will confuse people. Plus, not sure how I feel about some bland wrestler who looks like Bud Bundy on my TV screen every week. This was not a bad match. In fact, it might've been better than the match they had last week. I will spoil it for you now and say this was the best match of the night. Zema is once again trying to show off while Tony is fighting back. The finish comes when Tony gets a miracle roll up for the victory, thus evening the series. I think my main problem with this series is that you had to figure it would go to three matches. Since Zema got the first win, it took the fun out of this match since you had to figure they would give this one to Tony. They will end this series on next week's show, so that should be good. Oh, and the Hardy fangirl from earlier was going ape s*** when Tony got near her. This is sadly the most passionate fan I've even seen out of the Impact Zone.
Winner via pinfall: Tony Neese
Backstage where we find out Madison Rayne is the new VP of the KO division. According to kayfabe, Karen Jarrett gave her job up to Madison before she was fired, so I guess the transaction is "legal". I like the idea of Madison getting more screen time since she is the most underrated talent on that KO roster, but I would rather see her in a more active role as opposed to being appointed the new Vince McMahongina. There was also a backstage scene where the Pope was talking about being a better father figure than Devon. Devon would arrive to confront the Pope. He would provoke him and…..somebody….ANYBODY…..what the hell? Did somebody miss their cue in this scene? Devon had Pope against a wall for what seemed like an eternity as Devon's kids would FINALLY hit their father with a steel chair. Just so you know, yes this show is taped. TNA could simply do a second take, but I secretly think the creative staff and Dixie Carter don't give a s*** anymore. It would explain so much. Oh, and I guess Pope and Devon will happen at Genesis…
There was an on location scene with Eric Young and ODB. They are at some restaurant. Young is almost trying to pass it off as a date while ODB doesn't see it like that and acts rude at the restaurant. I'm just gonna save you the trouble and just move forward with the rest of the show. The scene sucked, plain and simple.
Back in the ring where Madison calls out Tara and Tessmacher. The Impact Zone continues to shake my head of disapproval. There is a USA chant during this bit….why? All three of them are American. I get it, Tara and Tessmacher are wearing USA colors, but it's still makes them look pretty silly. Madison makes them go up against each other tonight. Madison will be the special referee and that match begins right now. Why Tara and Tessmacher? Why not someone who actually gets featured on this show in a more consistent basis? TNA REALLY needs to do some spring cleaning because there's too many people on their roster and most of them aren't even doing anything on the show. Gee, I would sure like to get paid to do absolutely nothing. That's what we call living the Hulk Hogan style.
Match #3: Tara vs Tessmacher
What in the world was this? I can't sugar coat it. This match was bad. This match was REALLY bad. You can argue the match wasn't design to look good, but you know something is wrong when the Impact Zone is silent. It started off with a bunch of locks and silly rolling around. Madison is getting angry since she wants to see some actual conflict. She totally has a point there because it was just boring. Once again, TNA opened up the second hour of the program with a KO match. When will they learn? You open up the second hour with one of your bigger storylines or an interesting match. The match never had a conclusion. Madison actually got some tension between the ladies, but it went nowhere as both ladies would punch Madison and leave. I guess the purpose of these events is to lead towards Madison's destructive reign, but could they have thought of something more…..entertaining? I really advise skipping this match. Alicia Fox beating Beth Phoenix in under two minutes isn't so stupid all of the sudden.
Backstage where Sting and Hardy are marking out over each other. Don't we get enough marks from the IWC? By the way, did you listen to the background during this scene? As Sting and Hardy are talking, you can hear Mike Tenay talking about the RVD/Daniels tag team match for later tonight. If you recall, Tenay made this announcement after the opening scene. That would basically tell me they filmed this scene right after the opening bit and Tenay's commentary went through the background. Why didn't TNA pick an area to film that wasn't completely cut off from other sounds? It really makes TNA look bad when they can't even edit out simple stuff like this. Then again, maybe they just don't care anymore?
Back in the ring where James Storm cuts a promo. Storm says his home is in the ring and at a local bar in his hometown. He talks about pulling off a Tim Tebow with his late comeback against Kurt Angle at Final Resolution. We cut to the titantron and it appears Angle is in Storm's favorite bar in his hometown. He talks about how these people will be sorry about their luck. What will he do to them? I know what? He will torture them with the Best of Immortal and Jeff Hardy DVD. NOOOOOOOOO!!!
Match #4: Shannon Moore and Anarquia vs Eric Young and ODB; Wildcard Tournament match
Shannon did cut a promo in not being happy to be teaming up with Anarquia. Oh yeah, they had a storyline this year, didn't they? I wouldn't be surprised if you completely forgot. What caught my eye was when Shannon said he will do what he has done for 19 years, fight and win. Really? Shannon winning? This is the guy who JBL made his own personal bitch back in the day. Yeah, I'm no much of a Shannon Moore fan, sue me. The match was just more attempted comedy you get out of a Eric Young match. There was a point where Eric went to the outside and tried to touch Sarita and Rosita. Maybe Nintendo was wrong in saying touching is good? As ODB gets in the match, Anarquia does a scoop slam on her. Shannon gets mad since he doesn't like the idea of fighting a woman. He does what he should've done in the beginning of this match, leaves his partner. As Anarquia is distracted, ODB and Eric do a double move to take him down. At some point, ODB actually kicks Anarquia in the balls and gets the victory. This match was a mess. I wonder if it's too late to add this to the Worst Match of 2011 category? Then again, it's my award show. So, we will get another Young/ODB match in the future?Yes, because THIS is what will make TNA hit the map for 2012. I can already smell the ratings.
Winner via pinfall and moving on in Wildcard Tourney: Eric Young and ODB
It appears that local bar goes can't fight a trained wrestler. Keep that in mind the next time you get hammered. Overall, Storm has some pretty stupid friends. Angle takes them all down and kicks them in the jaw. It was a pretty silly segment, but it does set the stage for a rematch between Angle and Storm. Probably one of the best rivalries going on in TNA at the moment. Then again, not sure if that makes me happy or sad.
Match #5: Robert Roode and Bully Ray vs Jeff Hardy and Sting; No DQ match
If you're having a difficult time sleeping or dealing with insomnia, watch this match and I'm sure you will get a good nights rest. Oh man, I did not like this match. It operated like a free for all tag team match (tornado tag match). The action was split up so much that most of the match was in a duel screen. Now, it's common for pro wrestling to use the duel screen, but it's usually for a brief moment. I hated how this looked since the action was so small. There was an orgy of weapons in this match. It figures there would be since that's pretty much what Sting can do at this stage of his career. I'm fine with Sting getting involved ONCE in a great while, but the key word being "once". Another match that makes a strong case to be in the Worst match of 2011 category. For the most part, I hate it when you go overboard with the weapons. I understand that it was a gimmick match, but you don't have to shove it down our throats. Again, how can the two best heels in TNA have problems taking down a 52 year old man? Quite ridiculous. The finish comes when Hardy hits a crossbody on Roode, through a table. The show ends with the good guys celebrating. I advise extreme caution if you want to watch this match. I found it boring, slow paced, and hated how TNA went for a mini-TV vision for most of this match. The victory for Hardy makes the case that he can win the world title at Genesis. In terms of booking, it makes sense but I still detest to the idea of Hardy getting the gold so quickly. This is the same guy who screwed up less than a year ago. I know the Hardy fanboys will tell me to get over it, but I felt TNA gave this guy a slap on the wrist while they were quick on the ball when it came to dealing with Matt Hardy. Then again, if you read my Matt Hardy article, you already know how I feel about him, so let's just move on and finish this damn review already.
Winner via pinfall: Jeff Hardy and Sting
TNA, you did so well last week. Yeah, last week's show wasn't great or good, but at least it was average when you look back on what this company normally produces. I did not like what TNA did tonight. I liked the opening, X Division match, and the Storm bit, but didn't care for anything else. The matches were nothing to rave about. The main event was disappointing since there was too much of that hardcore style of wrestling (I realize people like that type of wrestling, but I've outgrown it. I like it when the use of weapons is kept to a minimum as opposed to it being about how many weapons can show up before the end of the match) and a lot of the action was pretty rough to sit through. That KO match was just awful. Again, I get they were going for storytelling, but who's wrote this scene? The Eric Young/ODB tag team is pretty hard to digest, but I guess it isn't the worst thing out there. It just seems like TNA is trying to make their tag team division a joke since Young is getting a new program. There wasn't much in terms of Genesis announcements. In fact, their only matches so far are Roode/Hardy, Storm/Angle, and Pope/Devon. There has been talk of the tag team and X division titles since those opponents are waiting to be determined, but it just feels like TNA is procrastinating again. Next week will be the third episode after a PPV or two weeks before the next PPV. If I know what TNA is going to do, they will jam pack the entire show and try to get through every storyline imaginable so they can fill out the card. I really dread those episodes. Again, TNA really needs to work on time management since cramming an episode will not make people tune in and it gets confusing. It's pro wrestling and it should be easy to follow and entertaining, but TNA honestly treats it like an Einstein project. That's where you get the stuff that makes no sense, confusing, or boring. This was not a good night by TNA. The in-ring action was lacking tonight. While some of the promos were okay, the rest were either silly or stupid. Not sure if they can do better next week, but we'll wait and see. That's going to do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. Tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. The voting is now open for the 2nd Annual WrestlingNerd award show, so cast your votes. Then again, I might have to make some additions after watching this episode. I will see you guys and girls on the next WrestlingNerd show, see you next time.
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