WrestlingNerd Presents: WWE WrestleMania 28 Rundown Part I

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another PPV rundown. With all the hype and build-up, it's time to do the WrestleMania 28 Rundown. For those of you new to the PPV rundown and have no idea how this works, here's the basics. I will talk about the matches on the PPV and try to break it down from every direction possible. I also break down the matches into who should win, who creative will pick, and I finally toss my very own prediction, but I don't care if I get them right or wrong and it's mainly there for novelty. Well, let's begin.

Kelly Kelly and Mario Menounos vs Beth Phoenix and Eve

Well, might as well get the weakest match out of the way. This is the celebrity match for this year. Or as I like to call it, the annual match where hardcore wrestling fans throw a fit because they hate celebrities showing up on their wrestling programs. You know what? This is the argument that I have never understood. I see and hear more wrestling fans complaining about the addition of celebrities on their programs, but celebrities have been showing up on wrestling shows for years. In fact, celebrities and WM have gone together since WM 1. I guess nobody remembers Mr. T being involved in a tag team match. Okay, kind of got off track there, but it was something I wanted to bring up since I think people complain about celebrities being involved in pro wrestling way too much. Now, back to your crappy rundown. With that said, can you really call Menounos a celebrity? She isn't very well known and you can probably call her a C-list celebrity. Then again, I know very little about her, so I can totally be off the mark. Menounos is somebody who can't seem to stay away from WWE. This will be her third match with the company and her first WM appearance. Part of the reason I don't care about this match is it has had very little build-up on the program. I seriously think this match has had more build-up on Extra than WWE programming. When the WWE does these celebrity matches, they usually advertise it on the show and gain tons of hype for it, but it almost seems like they don't care about this match. Then again, WWE already got the Rock to compete in a match against John Cena, so that's where they major publicity is coming from. So, I probably should talk about the actual match, but what is there to talk about? Even though Menounos isn't trained for the business, she's already a better wrestler than her partner. This match will feature either Phoenix and Eve selling the hell out of a rollup or something. The only thing I don't want to see happen is Phoenix getting pinned in this match. Phoenix is your champion, so I would think Eve will end up taking the pinfall. I don't think they will have Beth take the pinfall, but I wouldn't put it past them. The match will probably be nothing too special, but it will be over before you know it. Snooki's match from last year was quick and painless, so I expect this to be the same schtick. 

Who should win:

Do I really have to ask this question? It doesn't matter who should win since the celebrity usually gets the victory in these situations. 

Who creative will pick:

….oh…..that was funny. 

My final pick:

I'll go with the girl with the ridiculous last name and the real-life Barbie doll to win this match. The match will probably be weak, but think of it like an adhesive strip. It stings at first, but it will be over before you know it. 

Cody Rhodes vs Big Show; Intercontinental Championship

Want to know an interesting fact? Actually, let's make it a game. When was the last time the IC title was defended at WM? I give you a couple of moments….

Okay, time's up. Do you ever feel like you're back in school? Anyway, the last time the IC title was defended was at WM 25, when it was JBL vs Rey Mysterio. Then again, it was only a 20 seconds match. If you want to be serious, the last time the IC title was defended on the grandest stage was WM 18, between William Regal (REGAL!!!!!!! REGAL!!!!!!…..um, sorry) and RVD. I think what I'm trying to say is the IC title has gotten very little love in the last decade. As far as the storyline goes, it's simply to follow. Cody has gotten very cocky and arrogant. So arrogant that he walks around as a video game character. Mr. Assassin's Creed has been talking about how Show is a choke artist at the big event. Show has never won a solo match at WM and has some of the most embarrassing moments at the grandest stage. This would include memories like fighting a sumo wrestler and getting knocked out by a Mike Tyson wannabe. During that time, Cody has embarrassed the giant while Show continues to grow angry. There are a couple of ways for this match to go. Most people say Cody should win since he should go over somebody as big as the Big Show. At the same time, Cody has been working is way up the WWE ladder. He's getting to the point where he should drop the IC title in order to go for the big prize. I personally would like to see Cody be the IC champion a little longer. Cody can still gain something with it, even though he has been the champ since August. Another reason I say that is I'm not too excited about the idea of Show getting the IC title. What would Show gain from winning the IC title? At this stage of his career, not a whole lot. Other than that, there isn't a whole lot to say about the match. The match quality could be interesting, but you shouldn't expect a five star performance here. Basically, it will come down to how Cody can make the match work against the giant. 

Who should win:

As I already said, I would rather see Cody keep his championship. If they plan to push Cody to the main event right after WM, the title change would be fine. I would still hate the idea of Show getting the IC title, but at least something good can come from it. 

Who creative will pick:

WWE has set up the storyline in which Show needs to overcome his WM handicap, so he could be in-line to end his reverse Undertaker streak. Greatest streak ever!!!

My final pick:

This one can go either way. At the moment, I will say Cody gets the victory, but this will probably be something I get wrong. Then again, I already said my predictions don't mean jack, so let's move on. 

Randy Orton vs Kane

I rivalry that looked like it was thrown together at the last second. To be fair, WWE has given a reason for this rivalry occurring . According to kayfabe, Kane started to show a human emotion last year, in which he shook the hand of Randy. Because of this, Kane has gone back to his roots…..eh, kinda. Kane has raged war with Randy because of this human emotion, and there you have it. Overall, I'm not really interested in this match. I don't think it's bad or poorly put together since the rival can be interesting towards most people, but this is a match that easily gets overlooked with the other WM matches. It can be done well. Both guys know how to make a brutal type of match work, but there is no gimmick with this match. If it was a street fight or a No Holds Barred match, I think it would turn a couple of heads, but it seems like it will be a simple match. That of itself is pretty disappointing. I really don't have anything else to say about this, so I'm moving on. 

Who should win:

Even though Kane is the veteran between the two, I think he needs this match a little more than Randy. Kane has had a pretty rough stretch since showing up in the mask. He lost to Cena and now seems destined to lose this match as well. I think he needs this since it has underplayed the whole mask revival. I guess the monster has been tamed after all those years. Then again, when you have been around as long as Kane as, it seems destined to happen. 

Who creative will pick:

It would not be much of a surprise for the creative staff to be leaning towards Randy in this match. Besides, this can easily be one of those rivalries that is done in one shot. 

My final pick:

I have to pick Randy to win the match. After all, how can you not deny somebody who reminds you who their name is? My name is Randy Orton…….eeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…….fear me. 

Team Teddy Long vs Team John Laurinaitis; winner is GM of both Raw and Smackdown

Before I get started, I should at least say who are on the teams. Team Teddy has Santino has captain. Teddy's team is represented by Kofi Kingston, R-Truth, Zack Ryder, Great Khali, and the five time, five time, five time, five time, five time, five time, five time, five time, five time, five time, five time, five time…..

Okay, I'll be quite now. Team Johnny has David Otunga as the captain. Is there anything really special with the role of captain? Do you get an paycheck increase? Do you get a three way lined up with the Bella Twins? Actually, that sounds pretty kick ass, but we are really getting off topic. In the realms of kayfabe, let's pretend there is a luxury of being team captain. Johnny's team also has Dolph Ziggler, Jack Swagger (aka: Biff Tannen), Mark Henry, Miz, and Drew McIntyre. Christian was originally scheduled to compete in this match, but was taken out by CM Punk on Raw this past week. The real reason Christian is no longer in the match most likely has to be Christian not being medically cleared from the previous injury. Amazing how the IWC complained for months that they want Christian to return, but seem to forget that the guy was on the sidelines because of a real injury. Oh, but you read some mumbo jumbo on the internet? Oh, well now it all makes sense. Do you see why I don't rely on the dirt sheets? It's just not reliable reporting at the end of the day. Yeah, there's no such thing as the crest of reliability and……we are REALLY getting off track here. Because of Christian's injury, McIntyre is the replacement. I think Drew being the replacement was an excellent choice. Mainly because it opens up tons of possibilities for WM. Drew has been near the chopping block by Teddy for quite some time. He actually gains his job back, but only because of the help of Johnny. I can actually see a scenario where Drew completely turns on his team in order to help Teddy. You can make the argument that it wouldn't make much sense, but Drew has been due for some type of character change. What better way than to turn him face? At the same time, I keep thinking that Drew is there just because nobody else was available. Alberto Del Rio still hasn't shown up, so he must still be dealing with an injury. So far, this is going to operate like a tag team match. Something about 12 people being involved in a tag match can be sickening. I still have these images of last year's tag team match at WM. Remember how it lasted about 3 minutes? I really hope that they take the time and effort to make this a solid match. I was kinda hoping for an Survivor Series style match, but that could be a little long and some of the talent would look pretty weak if they had to take a pinfall 20 seconds into the match. This can be one of those matches that turns out to be good, but it also has the recipe to be extremely rushed, thus turning into a bad match. As far as the GMs go, I personally want to see Laurinaitis win. Now, before you start a war against me, let me explain this. Laurinaitis may continue to flub up his lines every now and then, but I think he has improved with his position since he took over. There's something about his character that works. Yeah, the guy is uncharismatic and pretty bland, but he makes it work to some degree. Something about the way he shows off his character is stupid, but funny at the same time. Also, there's something about Teddy Long as GM that I don't like. I'm not sure what it is, but it just doesn't sound right. Besides, how can you not laugh to this….

Oh, it' still funny after all these months. And if he leaves, there goes my catchphrase, Roboinaitis. We can't lose that, can we? 

Who should win:

I personally think Johnny's team should win. I know people don't like him, but when was the last time Teddy's character evolved? Seriously, he's been playing the same character for years. I guess I just want to see the robot win. 

Who creative will pick:

That's a tough one. Creative can be leaning towards either of them. 

My final pick:

These types of matches generally do more for the face. This is a tough choice, but I'm going with Team Johnny. This is one I can easily get wrong, but it doesn't matter. 

The Rundown is too large for one sitting. Check back in either Friday or Saturday (depending on how TNA does) for Part II. See you then.