What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today we take a look at WWE Raw 7/1/13. How does the first Raw of July fare? Let's find out and start the review.
Bag of cliches
We open up the show with Gandalf's beard. Daniel talks about the possibility of winning the MITB ladder match and becoming the best like no one ever was. Sheamus interrupts to quote those 18-seconds yet again. I swear that Sheamus' gimmick is to talk about what happened at WM 28. Since you already have an idea on what's going on here, let's not waste any more time--BRING OUT THE REST OF THE COMPETITORS!!! Talk tough to your guys so you can prove you're gonna win! Use those cliches before they become underused! Throw all your catchphrases into the fray! Plug the WWE App before Michael Cole does it for you! Have somebody call them out on--wait a second? CM Punk pretty much called them out on the predictable writing, so I gotta give them credit for acknowledging it. Well, it's about that time were somebody gets the fight started, but that strangely didn't happen. All that happened was Randy hitting the RKO on Kane after Kane went to stick up to his ex-boyfriend. I'm glad they didn't go overboard with it since the dialogue does its job. They built up the WWE Championship MITB match and I think it works. Nothing big, but not bad either.
Smackdown replay & Ziggles
To return the favor from last week's Smackdown, Shield utilizes the power of cheating to gain a victory on Christian and the Usos. It's really apparent Christian/Ambrose is the plan. I obviously have no issue with this since I had a feeling this was gonna happen ever since the first Shield attack on Christian. I look forward to these matches down the road.
Ziggler takes down Jinder Mahal in a quick match. After the match, 3MB try to take out Dolph but end up falling sinister to the ever-popular, jumping-over-the-steel-steps….
I'm still waiting for them to explain Dolph/AJ/Big E, but it can wait a while. My guess is Dolph's trying to get in as much sex with AJ before he kicks her to the curb. But don't worry about AJ, she'll find somebody a day later.
Why do things always end like this?
Bryan was able to get Kane his rematch against Randy tonight, but there's a catch. It turns out Daniel would be the special guest referee for the match. The first part of this match ended when Randy shoved Bryan, thus resulting in a DQ victory for Kane. After some complaining, Bryan decides to restart the match. In other words, that scene was entirely pointless. So they fight some more until Kane gets the victory due to Bryan doing a fast-count for his friend. After the match, Bryan and Kane continue to argue about the outcome. I love this pairing. Anything they do is somehow funny. I bet they could make filing taxes seem entertaining. It does add more to the storyline since Bryan's antics have gotten so far out of control that it's straining his friendship with his former tag partner. While this technically started weeks ago, I just like how they're doing things with these two. It's an interesting way of going about a tag team breakup. By the way, Randy takes all of this rather well….
Cry me more! Cry me more!
Wow, WWE really wants you to get into the fact they're having a champion vs champion match on tonight's show. It WWE could jerk-off the WHC and WWE titles any further, you would start to see the belts jizz during the Cena/Del Rio match. Hell, this is probably the main idea for this match. Well, it would be a first. Fandango makes his return by doing what he does best….running away from a fight. As odd as it sounds, Fandango is probably one of the favorites going into the MITB match since he has nothing going on for the time being. At the same time, it isn't his fault since he was dealing with a concussion. Ryback is such a bad-ass. He's so bad-ass that he quits matches due to leg injuries. Yeah, this match doesn't really do anything for Ryback or Miz. Geeze, all that muscle and 2nd grade insults, and yet he whines like a politician. Ryback is a joke these days. I hate saying that since he was really starting to get somewhere a year ago with the 'Feed me more' deal, but my have the mighty fallen. The worst thing to ever happen to Ryback is turning heel. Whineback doesn't rule!
Crazy McMahons & Walruses
As Mark Henry is cutting the promo, the audience is raping my ears with the 'what' chant. This might be the chant I hate the most from a wrestling audience. SCSA may have done a lot for the business, but everybody has to have that one mistake in their career. This has to be his. Anyway, Henry talks about the MITB match he has coming up with John Cena. I can see the WWE title change hands at MITB. He deserves it after the troll-tirement. Speaking of trolling, Stephanie informs Vickie that she'll go under a job evaluation since she's having a difficult time dealing Vince, Trips, and herself barking orders at her. I smell dirty laundry! My favorite moment out of this was Trips telling Vickie to not listen to the McMahons. Makes me wonder if Trips does that to his wife; or better yet, telling his kids to not listen to their mother….
Trips: Now kids, I want you to 'listen' to mommy, nod in agreement, and do the total opposite.
Kids: But I thought mommy was always right?
Trips: hahaha….oh, that's a good one. While we make-believe mommy is always right, the truth is she's bats*** insane and feeds you lies.
Kids: But what if mommy tells us to not jump off a cliff?
Trips: What did I just say? Do the opposite of what mommy's telling you!
Kids: I…..I…..I don't like the way this is going…
Trips: OBEY ME!!!
Kids: *screaming*
CM Punk hit the GTS on one of the PTP, but Curtis Axel stole the pinfall. This was obviously used to show how Punk and Heyman aren't on the same page these days. Perhaps if you gave him chocolates, maybe this will all go under the bridge? Not a whole lot of interaction between Punk and Pauly this week, but they continue to progress things.
The most important match in WWE's history….really?
It's time for the Cena/Del Rio match. As I mentioned earlier in the night, WWE went about as far as you can to hype up a match. They were making this seem like it was Jesus vs Satan. In fact, I'm surprised WWE didn't get this match pushed on CNN or your local news network. Hell, why stop there? How about we go back in time and see how Gandhi or Abe Lincoln feel about Cena/Del Rio? It's just Superman vs a pile of pesos. Talk about putting your eggs in one basket. Now to be fair, the match was actually pretty good, but it definitely didn't match the hype. The finish comes when Ziggles causes a very slight distraction, allowing Cena to hit the AA for the victory. Are you really surprised? You shouldn't be. The show ends with Henry intimidating Cena while Cena does that acting thing he has problems with. Henry scaring the s*** out of you, why? Because that's what he does!
Overall Impression:
After two weeks of good episodes, WWE slowed down this evening and gave you a very average showing. They did progress things and there were a couple of decent matches, but nothing really pops out at you. To be fair, this week happens to be American Independence Day, so I understand why it didn't seem like a whole lot wasn't written into the show. Most shows on a holiday-week tend to get this treatment since WWE is aware that most people are busy during the holidays, thus a drop in viewership. In fact, I expect Smackdown to get the same treatment as well, and considering that SD is treated as filler, it will be filler on top of your filler. There's still a way to make filler interesting and while there was a few moments that can make that argument for tonight's show, I don't think it really holds up. This is an episode worth skipping, but they did set things up for next week. While I expect more backlashing with the McMahons (Which can be fun), the Wyatt family is set to show up. I've talked in the past that the videos were very eerie/creepy, but something about them were very intriguing. While you can make the argument Bray Wyatt is chewing too much scenery in the vignettes, over-the-top performances is what pro wrestling is best at, so I think Bray Wyatt will fit in just fine. Not a great showing this evening, but there's enough pushed for next week that should give you hope for next week. That does it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. Tell me what you thought of the review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls in the next one.
It was mostly boring. Not sure why they're all going crazy for RVD, you've been able to watch him in TNA all year and he was slow and boring then. Hopefully WWE will use him better, but it won't make his old man wrestling style any less tiring.
ReplyDeleteI think it's funny when they bang on about American football and baseball, and they act like the whole world gives a shit. Mention Wimbledon though, Jerry puts it into the 'who cares' category. More people watch Wimbledon than WWE you idiots including Royal attendants and the prize money being over £1m! Or is it like every other sport, if you've been knocked out, you don't care? Three grown middle aged men and you've all just sounded like complete retards.
Oh, and I guess Mark Henry has never heard of Mariusz Pudzianowski then? I'm sorry Mr Henry, but your "gimmick" of the world's strongest man has been with you for so long that you seem to be starting to actually believe it. Until you have won the World's Strongest Man title, you have EARNT exactly jack shit.
Can I suggest you look up Mark Henry's various strongman feats before dismissing his claims at being the world's strongest man. Here's a little taste of what he has accomplished
DeleteMark Henry is the only human in history to have squatted more than 900 lbs without a squat suit and deadlifted more than 900 lbs raw in one and the same powerlifting meet.
While this show was just an average showing, your reviews continue to rise above mediocrity. (They also Rise Above Hate, they Never Give Up, and they Never Lose Cleanly!)
ReplyDeleteThe Commando clip being thrown in this week was hilarious, thanks for that addition.
I think you're onto a good theory with the MITB favorites being guys who aren't currently entangled elsewhere. The All-Heel one actually intrigues me more than the All-Star one. I'll expect Bryan to win the All-Star one, and I think I could be happy with just about anyone but Swagger winning the All-Heel one.
I'm thinking Big E will be AJ's next main squeeze, and these two will somehow cost Dolph his shot at the WHC Title, which would lead to a feud between Dolph and Big E.
ReplyDelete