WrestlingNerd Presents: WWE Raw 4/1/13 Review (WrestleMania is up in ashes)

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at WWE Raw 4/1/13. How does the final Raw leading into WrestleMania fare? Let's find out and begin. 

If The Shoe Fits…

We open up the show with John Cena. The man talks more of the same old stuff as before. I need this win because I need a paycheck bonus. Kids love me, but male adults hate my Fruity Pebble ass. The Rock will get turned into dust on WM, blah blah blah. Yeah, we get it! Trust me, we get it. After their interaction last week, I find the Rock/Cena segments on tonight's show disappointing. I was starting to get into the match based on what they did last week, but you top that by doing this? By talking about all the cliches they've done for the last year. Of course! To be fair, they did a good job in setting up the match last week that I don't mind them taking a break before Sunday. Now it's time to see how Rock and Cena will piss off the internet world. While this is occurring, Vince McMahon is counting his money. Muhahahaha!!!

WrestleMania's Mid-Card Matches

Sheamus, Randy Orton, and Big Show took out 3MB. How is this a big deal? Because of wrestling logic, that's why. So sit down and shut up! After the match, Shield claims they will not be able to work as a team and they will fail. I remember a time where Shield was standing for 'injustice'. Since WM season started, they have taken their eyes off that goal. There's nothing wrong with that since Shield at least remains interesting due to their stock, but it would be nice to see them get back on track. Team WWE is a phony. A great big phony! A big, fat phony!!! Daniel Bryan and Dolph Ziggler had a pretty good match. Thanks to Big E and AJ, Dolph steals the victory when Bryan kicks out at 2….What? Oh, I guess that's how it works now. After the match, Big E shows off the power of steroids to take out Team Hell No on his own. This was the first time Big E made an impression since his Cena attack last year. He truly felt like a powerhouse in this scene and it adds something to the match. Makes you wonder why this didn't happen sooner, but at least something finally happened. 

And Now It Comes Full Circle…

Shawn Michaels arrives and wants to be in Triple H's corner for the Brock/Trips match at WM. Haven't we heard this before? If you remember what happened at SummerSlam last year, HBK was originally gonna be in his corner. Brock Lesnar 'broke' HBK's arm, which prevented him from appearing at the show. While I can see the intrigue for HBK being present, I can see it working against it. I guess we shall see where this goes. As I've said for months/weeks, I hope the two can get on the same page for this match or else it will drag like the first time. While I'm not completely invested in the main event, the build for this match has been done rather well. I have to give them credit for that. 

Miz = Mr. Pre-show

Wade Barrett took out Zack Ryder in another squash match for tonight's show. I think I'm gonna have to start keeping a tab on all the squash matches that happen on Raw. I need to test this theory of mine. We find out that Wade will put up the IC title on the pre-show. I might as well start referring to the Miz as Mr. Pre-show. I think it suits him based on what he's been doing for the last year. I know I should be talking about the actual match for WM, but what is there to talk about? This rivalry was slapped together at the last moment. There's almost no rivalry going on here. Why build the undercard when we can have Rock and Cena talk for another five hours. Oh, did I just say that out loud? 

When April Fools' Pranks Go Wrong

Santino's prank was actually pretty funny. I gotta give him credit for that one. Vickie Guerrero and Butterfingers Maddox didn't take too kindly to those words, so he has to go up against Mark Henry. As soon as I heard about his 'surprise opponent', I knew it was gonna be Henry. It's almost predictable to a precise degree. After ANOTHER squash match…..blahalallalala. Sorry about that. After….THAT, Ryback comes out to give one last interaction between the two before WM. I swear these two have had more build on SD than on Raw. It's actually kinda sad when you think about it. I'm still looking forward to the match. I don't know what that's saying about the current card if this is one of the 3-4 matches I'm looking forward to this Sunday. 

Alberto Del Rio vs The Blob

You knew something was up when Zeb Coulter starts getting himself into matches. This one ends in a DQ when Zeb uses one of Ricardo crutches to attack Del Rio. Jack Swagger takes out Del Rio after the match. While the rivalry started late because Swagger was rushed back on television, this rivalry started off promising. I really liked the approach they went with this angle for a while, but this thing has come to a crashing halt for several weeks. Because of this approach, I've lost some interest in this match because they're at a standstill with this whole thing. I don't even think the writers had nothing else more to do with these two until the actual match. I really hope that's the case since something needs to happen between these two. You also have to keep in mind that Dolph can change things drastically with his options come this Sunday. 

Dancing With Fools

I don't know about you, but it literally felt Rock cut the same promo as Cena. The only difference was instead of Cena, it's the Rock. Well, that was an easy paycheck. In the meantime, Chris Jericho has a match with Antonio Cesaro. During the match, Fandango comes out to score Jericho's performance. Even though I don't care for the character, I thought that was a nice touch to Fandango. It makes him look more like a dick. Jericho still manages to pull off the victory despite the faaaaaabulous distraction. After the match, Fandango attacks Jericho and takes him out with two legdrops off the top rope. I have a prediction as to what's gonna happen to Fandango. He will probably beat Jericho at WM. He will do well for a while, but creative will forget he was ever around and start losing matches. 4-5 months from now, Fandango is jobbing to various talents. A year from now, he will probably be released and everybody would've forgotten the name, Faaaaaandaaaaaangooooooooo. I know there's a lot of people who think I'm way too negative on this character, but I don't think he will go anywhere at the end of the day. I wouldn't mind if the character actually proves me wrong, but I think the WWE's track record is against him. Let's just wait and see who's right and wrong. 

Boobies!!!

That's pretty much what you're getting with this match. What's surprising to me is how this was one of the more competitive diva matches I've seen as of late. I don't know how I feel about that. Rhodes Scholars, Brodus Clay, and Ten---what the f*** is that? 

I feel like it's staring into my soul while eating it away. What am I looking at here? I'm not sure how to react to this. The Bellas defeat Brodus' ladies. Kinda funny how this is on the WM card while the IC match made the pre-show. 

Deadman Gets Punk'd

The final segment of the night was Punk and Undertaker. Taker vows that he could lose the streak due to his state of mind, but it won't matter once he gets his hands on Punk. The druids came out and I thought this was Taker's doing, but something was off the second you saw Paul Heyman as Paul Bearer. Wow, that's frighting. I'm not talking about the scene. I'm talking about the Bearer look Heyman pulled off. I'm not sure what the scariest part of the show was? Tensai dressed like Brodus or this scene. One of the druids attacks Taker. Seconds later, it's revealed to be CM Punk. To end the scene, Punk dumps the urn's ashes all over Taker and rubs it all over himself. I hope we don't see Punk starting to rub his nipples afterwords. Yikes! I'm not sure what to make of what I just saw. It does add something to their match/rivalry, but I still can't help but feel more could have been done with this rivalry if they had more time. Plus, I felt they focused way more on Paul Bearer than the actual feud. Some can also view the scene as offensive, but I've seen raunchier material from WWE compared to this. I'm kinda indifferent to this scene. Punk does come off as a super villain based on his actions, so that's a positive. Still, I feel Taker's streak isn't at danger and Punk will lose this Sunday. That element does take me out of the match slightly. 

Overall Impression:

This was an upgrade to last week's episode, but something still doesn't feel right. WM is this Sunday and I don't find myself very excited for the show. I always love this time of year in the wrestling world, but I'm not as jazzed up as I normally would be for this event. The show does set up all the matches for this Sunday, but I felt more could have been done with the storylines since a good chunk of these storylines could've used more development. I know a lot of people are thinking WM 29 will end up bombing. While I have been critical on the card's presentation and build, I want to wait and see since this PPV could have something that makes this event very memorable. This event can surprise me and be very interesting, but we will have to wait until Sunday to find out. Tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls in the next one.