Saturday, March 30, 2013

WrestlingNerd Presents: WWE Smackdown 3/29/13 Review (The Return of John Roboinaitis)


What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at WWE Smackdown 3/29/13. Wait, I still review this show? What the f--

Robots Rise Again
We open up the show with nostalgic whoring. That's seriously what the Rock's doing with this story time deal. Well, it's actually a combination of nostalgic whoring and mastering the cheap pop, but who's keeping track of that? That's when we get a surprise from the greatest robot to ever grace professional wrestling. Ladies and gentlemen, John Laurinaitis….

I'm not sure if it's sad or not that I'm more interested in a Laurinaitis appearance than the Rock. For some reason, I always enjoyed Laurinaitis. Was he terrible on the mic? Absolutely. Was his personality awful? You better believe it. Did he really smoke an entire cigarette company? It's pretty damn likely, but there's still something about the guy that just makes me laugh. Roboinaitis wants to help the Rock at any cost against John Cena. Rocky likes this offer so much that he takes out Johnny. I love how Johnny sells all of this. Like taking the GTS from Punk, it's like he couldn't give less of a s***. The scene briefly talks about the Rock/Cena match, but who cares. For a split second, I was reminded of how People Power had the touch…..It had the power….YEAH!

Filler Part I
Chris Jericho and Wade Barrett had a match that didn't last for very long. Thanks to the Miz, Wade is distracted long enough for Jericho to hit the Codebreaker. It's really hard for me to care about Wade/Miz. Both of their stocks are so low and the title is so underplayed that it's laughable to even make this mean something. Remember when holding the mid-card title meant something? This is also back when they would actually use the damn thing. At this point, they might as well unify both mid-card titles. The Brock Lesnar/Triple H build for tonight consisted of an interview by Paul Heyman. He does a good job to sell the match, but the most distracting thing to me was Pauly's black eye. Seriously, I thought that thing was gonna come alive and eat Heyman. Did you see the size of that thing? At least Mark Henry and Ryback had more development on SD than they did on Raw. Still, kinda hard to get overly excited for a bench pressing contest. I'm not saying it isn't impressive, but it isn't something that engages me. The scene ended when Henry choked out Ryback with the bar. I don't know why, but I'm imagining the Peter Griffin/knee deal when he's trying to catch his breath. 

Filler Part II
Daniel Bryan teamed up with Kaitlyn to go up against Dolph Ziggler and AJ. Kaitlyn wins the match for her team with a Spear. I really would like to know why the Spear has become her thing know. I know this is something I should've brought up a long time ago, but it's a bit odd that this all of the sudden became her finisher. Meanwhile, Jack Swagger kills a Punjab and a Leprechaun because Zeb Coulter got hungry. I wonder if that came with a Maple Shake? Anyway, Ricardo Rodriguez shows up after the match (ended in a double countout if you cared) to distract Swagger. Alberto Del Rio arrives from behind to take out the 'Merica Boy. Zeb starts to think about a Mexican dessert until Ricardo hits him in the back with one of his crutches. The bad guys retreat and that was about it. Yeah, I'm just gonna assume that the creative staff forgot about the WHC rivalry this week since there was almost no build to witness. Talk about being extra lazy. The final match of the night was Sheamus, Randy Orton, and Big Show vs Rhodes Scholars and Antonio Cesaro. Antonio talked about the meaning of life with that promo. It just moves your soul if you listen to it. Either that or it was the mating call of a pelican. Or better yet, a space pelican! I love how JBL is freakin' out about Sheamus delivering the Brogue Kick to Cody Rhodes. Don't do it! He has a future as a porn star. Well, he's got the creepy mustache for it. After the match, Shield shows up in the audience, but Team WWE takes it to the Shield. The show ends with Shield retreating as the three guys show they CAN work together to take out the Shield. Does anybody remember when I said Randy was on the verge of a heel turn back around TLC? It's been a few months, but I still feel he's really close to doing something sinister. I might as well toss this out there for the time being. I think Randy will screw over his team at WrestleMania. I can't really explain why I'm thinking this. It's just a hunch I have. 

Overall Impression:
Not really sure I decided to review SD this week. I haven't completely taking SD off of this page. I will still talk about it when I feel something of value is worth talking about. If anything big happens on the show, I will still review it, but I don't feel the need to review it if they're gonna resort to filler. I think the reason I jumped into this one was because of John Laurinaitis. There was just something refreshing about seeing Mr. Excitement on tonight's show. It may be considered sad that I got more enjoyment out of Johnny's presence than I did for the rest of the show. To be fair, the rest of the show wasn't bad. I think from top to bottom, SD was probably the best show out of the week. I just found Raw and Impact boring, but this episode wasn't too bad. It wasn't what I would call great or something worth checking out. I don't really know why I liked this showing. Maybe I was in the right mindset to enjoy this? I have no f***ing idea, but at least I can be honest about it. Tell me what you thought of the review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls in the next one. 

2 comments:

  1. If only Laurinaitis still had that People Power Scooter around.

    ReplyDelete
  2. SmackDown has ALWAYS been rubbish - It has ALWAYS been the filler show for the next Monday Night RAW !!!

    ReplyDelete