WrestlingNerd Presents: TNA Impact Wrestling 12/20/12 Review (Warning: May induce vomiting)

What up wrestling fans, I'm the WrestlingNerd bringing you another written review. Today, we take a look at TNA Impact Wrestling 12/20/12. How did this week fair? Let's find out and begin. 

Match #1: Devon vs Kurt Angle; TV Championship

With open up with the greatest championship in wrestling today, the TV title. Before this match starts, Aces and Eights and TNA guys start a brawl before the match starts. Devon manages to sneak in a chop block on Angle before this match starts. Keep in mind on how the ref sent everyone to the back that wasn't involved in this match. KEEP THAT IN MIND!!! Not that it's important or something. I don't know why, but matches between Devon and Kurt seem boring. Their chemistry keeps them from having good matches. Well, it isn't their fault. TNA insist on having this rivalry between them so they can give Kurt something to do. The finish comes when Aces and Eights show up AGAIN and interfere. Nobody ever takes the TNA refs seriously, but can you blame them? These guys are so ridiculous that not even a cartoon character would believe them. With the ref having issues with Aces and Eights, one of the random members hit Kurt with a weapon. Devon picks the bones and retains the title. Aces and Eights is determined to keep the worst championship in TNA. Gotta aim low!!!

Winner via pinfall and still TV Champion: Devon

The Knockout deliberation, BROUGHT TO YOU BY FIVE-HOUR ENERGY!!! Does TNA have any shame in these cheap advertisements? Something tells me they don't as long as the check clears. Brooke Hogan discuss who should get the KO title match. Does anyone really enjoy these deliberations? I honestly don't see the point of them. It just seems like a cheap excuse for the Hogans to eat up more time. Do they get paid for every minute on television? Actually, that would explain a lot. Well, ODB ends up getting eliminated since she wants to continue with this abomination of a marriage with Eric Young. Is there any point to keeping ODB/EY together? If you enjoy their comedy, that's fine. For me, I can't stand their attempts at comedy. 

Match #2: Big and Sleaze vs King Pot Heads

I love how RVD and Kenny King are teaming up for a tag team match, despite what happened last week. Either RVD is obeying the wrestling logic and doesn't believe in the concept of instant replay or he decided to go on a shroom adventure. At this point, I will believe either one. The match was kinda there and really didn't stand out. The finish comes when Morgan is about to hit the Carbon Footprint on Kenny, but Kenny looks at his surroundings and decides to book it and let RVD take the fall. So, that's two straight weeks where Kenny has acted like a complete douche. You might as well get used to the idea of Kenny playing the heel. It's still early to see how this will play out for him, but at least it gives Kenny some type of motive. 

Winner via pinfall: Joey Ryan and Matt Morgan

Just as Hogan talks about the Impact Wrestler of the year (Ballot consist of Thunderlips, Hulk Hogan, Terry Bollea, and Mr. America), Aces and Eights interrupt the party. Aces and Eights claim they will reveal details in 2013. Cuz you know, they simply can't do that now. We're padding!!! We're padding!!! We're padding down the river. Bully Ray arrives for the save. I love how a group of thugs with weapons run away from one guy. Hogan still can't trust Bully, so he walks away from him. Ummm….Aces and Eights can attack Bully right now. What's stopping them? This scene gives some foreshadowing towards 1/3/13. If you've been paying attention, you will know that TNA is hyping up that date. Well, have I ever told you folks that I told you so? Well, you'll find out later in the review what I mean by that. We aren't done with this Bully/Hogan stuff. Get your barf bags ready. 

Earlier in the night, Kaz got a call from a guy named "Chris". You get it? It's Santa? TNA is so clever!!! For this next scene, Christopher Daniels is with Santa and they want to give AJ Styles' kids presents since their daddy cannot support them. Even after chasing Styles away, they just can't leave him alone. The tree has two two stars on it….

I love this look that Daniels gives when Santa ask if he's been a good boy this year. That photo was priceless. That seriously made my day right there. I want that on a Christmas card. James Storm comes out since he has nothing else to do on this show. So, what they've basically done here is replace Styles with Storm in order to keep this rivalry going. In fact, I'm trying to wonder what are the reasons for Storm wanting to get involved with Kaz and Daniels. I realize Storm has been going up against Kaz and Daniels for the last couple of weeks, but why? What business does Storm have on these guys? Is this because of the Gangnam Style? Is it because they don't drink beer? Are they pissed off that Ric Flair isn't with TNA anymore? Seriously, what's the feud? Oh, and if you use the excuse that Storm thought Kaz and Daniels were insulting Christmas, that's a lame excuse and you know it. I got it!!! Storm vs Santa for match of the year. Why do I feel that Santa was played by the cafeteria worker at Universal Studios? 

So, after all those weeks of the 1/3/13 build, it turns out that it will be Sting returning. As stupid as this sounds since Sting re-debuts every two months, Aces and Eights is all of the sudden concerned for Sting's return and their lack in numbers. See, this is why doing that giant brawl in earlier in the year makes TNA look silly. You had those Aces and Eights member coming from everywhere. They were to your left, to your right, up the rafters, under the ring, up your ass. Seriously, they were everywhere. What happened to all those guys? The president fired them all since he couldn't think of a stupid enough names for all of them. Well, it turns out Devon has a guy in mind on who will join the renegade group of card players. Tune in next week for more bulls***, ladies and gentlemen. This is the part where people theorize who will be the mystery guy. Personally, I don't give a s***. It probably won't lead to anybody big or surprising. Well, there's still a small glimmer of hope for something interesting, but don't be surprised if it turns out to be Crimson or somebody like that. 

Match #3: Tara vs Mickie James; KO Title match

Brooke decides to give Mickie a title shot since she needs to take a backseat to a bunch of pigeons. Thanks to interference, Tara is able to steal this match. The match was fair for KO standards, but not a whole lot to report. For the most part, I'm indifferent to the Tara/Jesse pairing. It isn't great, but isn't terrible either. It's just kind of there. 

Winner via pinfall and still KO Champ: Tara

Match #4: Jeff Hardy vs Austin Aries; TNA World Title

Not the best Aries/Hardy match, but not too shabby either. This is a great edition to the series. The finish comes when we end up having a ref bump. Aries use this to hit a low blow, followed by the Brainbuster. Since the ref is down, we get a backup ref to make the count. Just as the count is about to come down, Bobby Roode interrupts the count and attacks Aries. Hardy ends up hitting Swanton Bomb to retain the title. You should've figured that Bobby would get back in the middle of this. I personally don't mind this move. Like I mentioned last week, Aries' motives for hiring Aces and Eights makes no sense, but I can allow this to pass since I prefer a much more edgy Aries than a tame Aries. A triple threat match is the best way to go. It sounds like it could be a lot of fun. 

Winner via pinfall and still TNA World Champ: Jeff Hardy

Now would've been a good way to end the show, but TNA wants to make sure you have your vomit-reflexes. Just as Hogan is leaving the building, he sees Brooke and Bully making out. Oh boy, where do I begin? First of all, why didn't Hogan do anything about this? Isn't this what he doesn't want to see? So, why just watch it and just drive away? Maybe he had to wash away the sin. It appears that Bully was lying to Hulk….kinda. Bully has claimed that Brooke has been the one interested in him, blah blah blah. Just say it out loud to yourself. Brooke Hogan making out with Bully Ray? Who wrote this? Who asked for this? If Bully was cocky, arrogant, and showed off his calves and talked tough, this would make perfect sense. Can you even call him 'Bully Ray' anymore? He's more like Buddy Ray at this point since he turned face….I think. I think that's one of my main problems with this whole thing. Bully works a hell of a lot better as a bad guy. I know this has been going on for a couple of weeks, but I still can't move past this. 

Overall Impression:

Between tonight and the Slammys, I'm trying to figure out which is the less of two evils. Okay, I wouldn't go that far. Tonight's Impact was somewhat presentable, but not a whole lot stood out. One thing I really liked was the entire progression between Hardy, Aries, and Roode. I think that was progressed very well and I think adds a lot of intrigue for down the road. The Christmas bit was a bit of a guilty pleasure because of how ridiculously hammy it was. With that said, there was some disappointments. I didn't like how they announced who 1/3/13 was already. Not only was the reveal or surprise completely gone, but the fact that it's Sting is such a letdown. Sting returns so many times to TNA that it has lost complete meaning. Sting's returning? From what? A month off? Going to pick up a pizza? It's ridiculous and just an excuse to get the Impact Zone to get their panties up in a bunch when their hero returns for the one-millionth time. Not even Undertaker gets this many returns in a year, so I wish they would present these returns in small doses and not blow it up completely. Most of you know that I'm not big on the Brooke/Bully deal and while tonight's setup adds some intrigue (major emphasis on 'some'), it also offers a heavy sigh of disappointment. There is some good to be had with tonight's show, but there's plenty of spots that could prevent you from enjoying this. That's gonna do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. As always, tell me what you thought of my review or tonight's show. I will see you guys and girls in the next one.