We open up the show with Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff. Before I get into that, they showed highlights of last week's events. I probably should have brought this up last week, but what kind of executive in a business suit tells their client "You got served"? Is this a wrestling show or a music video? Oh, that's right, wrestling matters here follks....Anyway, Hogan gloats about the fact that Mick Foley is fired. Both Hogan and Bischoff state they want to make things fair in TNA since they are aware that "The Network" can get involved again and Hogan vows things will be fair (Anyone else calling bs on this statement?). They call out both Mr. Anderson and Sting. Both guys come out, and luckly Anderson has stopped with the whole Sting get up. Hogan informs both guys their title match will be fair because there won't be any shenangians or interference and it will be a clean match (wink, wink?). Anderson says he has be acting like Sting so he can mock him. He also says Sting is a lier and a joke. Sting retialiates by saying he won't lose to Anderson because he cannot afford to lose because he is under the impression that him being champion keeps Hogan and Bischoff at bay (You could probably argue if Hogan and Bischoff had this much of a problem with Sting, they should just fire him. Of course, that is when "The Network" will probably come back and we are back to where we started.). Sting also confronts Hogan and tells him this little war between the two of them will end in two ways. Either H & B will continue down their path and Sting will be there to confront them, or Hogan becomes a good guy again (are they doing a shoot promo now?). Sting ends the scene by saying Bischoff is a cancer and Hogan should cut him off. Overall, a strange way to open up the show. I guess people are wondering when Foley will appear on tv again, and you might not want to hold your breath. It was reported during the weekend that Foley asked for his release from TNA and it appears he is no longer associated with the company. So, I guess when I was writing last week's review that I was correct to assume that Foley was indeed done with the company. See, it is this type of thing that keeps TNA from becoming a major factor in pro wrestling when they keep doing stuff a second or third rate company would do by putting a guy in a big roll with the company who had no intentions of resigning another contract to stay. I guess with the opening that the whole idea of "The Network" is kinda dead, but I guess it can come about again if Hogan gets a little out of control with power in TNA.....either that or TNA actually gets their thumbs out of their asses and actually lays out all of their options for the next rep of "The Network" this time around. It's things like this that almost show why TNA isn't ready to be a big factor in pro wrestling when there is so much more they need to fix in order to be considered a threat. It was finally satisfying to see Anderson ACT like Anderson and not do the Sting deal anymore. They built up the world title match in a fair way....until Sting completely changed his focus to Hogan again. Thanks TNA for reminding me old guys only think about themselves in this company and don't care about younger or in their prime talent. Come on, nobody wants to see Sting and Hogan do their rivalry again. Lord knows that Sting can barely perform at this point and Hogan can barely walk down the ramp these days. At this point, I really can't see the direction the company is going in because of the whole mess with Foley asking to leave the company and it also appears that the creative staff is still thinking of some ideas. Well, we better move on with the rest of the review or else we could be on this topic and how it doesn't make any sense all day long. By the way, did anyone else find it funny when Hogan mentioned the only thing about the company that has changed is the name? He is right because it is still the same stuff. Same creative staff, same wrestlers, same confusing storylines, stuff that makes no sense, and plotholes up the ass. Well, at least he is self aware.
Match #1: Winter and Angelina Love vs Mickie James and Tara
The match was fair, for KO standards, but still nothing worth watching. The finish comes when Madison Rayne takes out Tara during the match. With the slight hestitation from Mickie, this allows Love to hit a finisher on her for the clean win. This company's slogan should be, where wrestling matters, and so do zombie chicks. Has anyone else been noticing Impact opening up with a KO match the majority of the time? Just something i've been noticing lately.
Winner via pinfall: Winter and Angelina Love
There was a quick backstage scene with Beer Money and Alex Shelley where Robert Roode was giving them a pep talk. Another backstage scene where Mexican America (Yes, they still work here. Seriously, how many times does TNA just have people disappear for weeks or months and then they just show up out of nowhere and act like everything is normal?) say they deserve a tag title shot and aren't getting anything because they are Mexican. You know what is strange? They actually have a argument. They actually competed at the last PPV and beat a tag team while British Invasion has been a ghost for the last two months and all of the sudden get a title shot? Clearly, something got mixed up in the script. Oh, and now for some of the worst camera shots in the world. In some random bar in God knows where (Thanks TNA for telling the audience where this actually took place. I guess we are to assume it took place in Orlando), a brawl breaks out between Samoa Joe and Crimson. This was some of the worst brawling and camera work I have ever seen. I realize TNA was going for a modern day reaction since they are "claiming" that some random guy posted this on the internet, but I really don't buy that since it seems more like a work that TNA did. I realize it was suppose to be a cell phone, but couldn't they get a better phone with better quality? Not only that, but was this filmed during an thunderstorm? Seriously, 90% of the brawl was in total darkness. If this was actually some random fan, then I suppose it is ok, but if this is TNA's work, this just further proves how lazy this company is. How many times in pro wrestling have you seen on location scenes with some good lighting and camera work? Well, TNA doesn't belive it that since they want to go with more of a "real" image, but it just comes off as crap. This does add fuel to the feud, but make sure next time people can actually see the feud, because when you see this video, it just comes off as half assed. By the way, that is how they continue to buildup to this rivalry for this week. We never once hear from Joe or Crimson and they never make an appearance tonight. What a load. I guess we had to make room for backstage scene #190864290 instead of getting a follow up.
Match #2: Mexican America vs James Storm and Alex Shelley
Seriously, Anarquia has been watching way too many Cheech & Chong movies. The Brits are on commentary and......WOW....the Brits actually show up? I guess they finally got out of the Impact Witness Protection Program. Magnus was on the headset while Douglas Williams was just watching the action. Magnus was actually kinda funny on the headset and added something that has really been missing when Tazz and Tenay are calling the action. There was some miscommunication between Shelley and Storm since they both have different wrestling backgrounds. This kind of thing would have been nice to see if they decide to make this match around a month ago. That way, we get the proper buildup between the contrasting differences between Storm and Shelley. Instead, TNA is having to put this in fast forward mode and isn't getting the buildup that it should. Storm had the match when he hit the Backstabber, but Sarita and Rosita distract the ref and thus the match continues. The finish comes when shenangians are coming from left and right, and finally Shelley attempts a Super Kick on a Mex American member, but hits Storm and Mex American takes out Shelley and picks up the bones to win the match. The match was nothing special, and I think the only thing resembeling entertainment so far was Magnus on commentary. I just thought of something. Why wouldn't BM select Daniels since he is a member of 4Tune? Do they not trust their own stable anymore?
Winner via pinfall: Mexican America
Backstage scene where Anderson and Gunner talk about taking out Sting. Can we have Gunner say more than five words? Seriously, this guy has a good look and I want to see if he can cut a promo or not. We also get a very strange backstage scene where Mexican America confront Hogan in wanting a title shot. Hogan tells them to shut up and let him do things his own way. Mex America walk away, but are clearly not happy about Hogan's response. Ok, so this doesn't make any sense. Why would Hogan, who has been playing a heel for quite a while, start acting like a good guy and deny the heels in this case? I guess Hogan is trying to keep true to his words in trying to make this a fair show so he can avoid dealing with "The Network", but it still doesn't add up. This looks like a scene that was written for Foley instead of Hogan. This was definitely one of the stranger scenes that I saw tonight. Ok, after more Kurt Angle/Jeff Jarrett buildup by the production staff, we are joined by both of them in the ring for a verbal debate. Jarrett talks about how he stepped aside to let Angle be the star of the company way back when he signed him to TNA, but claims that Angle grew a massive ego and became a jackass since he started embarassing Jarrett as a performer. Jarrett figured to do everything in his power to make Angle lose everything and become a better wrestler than him. Angle says all he ever wanted was a 1 on 1 match and claimed even though he feels bad for Karen, it is Jeff's fault because she should have never been involved. This was actually a pretty decent promo by both guys. See, why couldn't this whole rivalry be just about these two guys and not add stupid s*** like MMA, custody papers, Karen, and pornstars? Just shows when you break it down, this could have been a good feud. Only if TNA didn't add so much bulls*** to this rivalry.
Bully Ray comes out and issues an open challenge. He also critizes AJ Styles. He says he will accept any challenge.....OTHER than Devon. We hear the worst entrance music in the world, meaning RVD has accepted the challenge.
Match #3: RVD vs Bully Ray
The audience was almost dead for this match. Bully was completely in control for this match. Wow, was RVD having to job to Bully? Have to admit, I never thought I would be seeing that. The finish comes when we notice that Styles is in the audience. Bully notices this and is distracted by Styles. This allows for RVD to get a breather and he eventually hits like two moves. Seriously, two strikes and a Frogsplash later, RVD has one the match. The match was very short and it almost didn't make any sense considering that RVD had so much difficulty against Bully. I guess it is understandable since the rivalry is between Styles and Bully and RVD has nothing to do with it.
Winner via pinfall: RVD
Backstage scene where Kaz and Brian Kendrick are searching for Abyss and are carrying Janice with them. They find Abyss and this makes him quote more Art of War crap. Remember, because this is where Wrestling Matters. He also says the X Division is dead and claims the belt is called the Extreme Championship (Can Vince McMahon sue for something like this?). He issues a Three Way match for the belt at Slam and I guess we are to assume that Kaz and Kendrick accepted the challenge. Once Abyss leaves, Kaz calls Abyss an idiot for putting himself in a disadvantage while Kendrick claims he is a poet. There are times where Kendrick is straight forward, but also times where he says some really stupid stuff. Why would he be praising Abyss? This guy is the one responsible for your division being in life support and your praising him? That would be like Kirby saying thanks to King Dedede for stealing all of the food. Makes no sense right? Well, that is because it doesn't.
Match #4: ODB vs Velvet Sky
Tenay informs the people watching that ODB doesn't have a contract. This just blows my mind since you would have figured "The Network" or Hogan would seem to have a problem with random people walking in and demanding matches. I know, more wrestling logic since in reality, she probably has a contract. Then again, knowing TNA, I wouldn't be shocked she is just getting paid for every appearance. Before the match started, Sky attacked ODB on the entrance ramp. It appears Sky has the advantage, but ODB eventually takes control. After awhile, they are finally in the ring and the match has started. This match SUUUCCCKKKKEEEDDD!!! I think it was the longest match of the night and it really dragged. Yeah, wrestling matters so much that the KOs make the longest matches. Not only that, but the early going of this match was just nothing but punching, more of that please? The ending to this match was completely stupid. ODB has this match in control, but Sky sneaks a DDT and wins the match. Does TNA even know how to book a feud? It would have made more sense for ODB to win to continue the feud, but with Sky magically pulling this out of her ass, it almost makes this feud over. Not to mention that ODB has just been destroying Sky, but can't handle a DDT? Plus, Sky has shown no fight with ODB, but somehow wins the match? I really have no idea what TNA is trying to do here. Maybe we should start calling her Velvet Cena based on tonight's performance.
Winner via pinfall: Velvet Sky
Backstage scene of Sting trying to get Eric Young on the same page, but he continues with the comedy routine. Sting gets angry and tells him to ditch the comedy and actually get serious. I guess Sting wasn't paying attention when Young got the concussion, since based on the kayfabe of this show, Young is acting goofy because of the concussion. Damn, you would have figured the concussion would have gone away at this point? Then again, more wrestling logic. How else can you explain Goldust still stuttering when talking for years in the WWE? Oh, and they showed more highlights of Devon and Pope continuing their rivalry over on Explosion. Wow......what an exciting concept. What a cheap method to get people to check out your online show when nobody cares about these two anymore. Seriously, you might as well grant Pope his release if your going to be showcasing him what is TNA's version of WWE Superstars.
Match #5: Mr. Anderson and Gunner vs Sting and Eric Young
What a disappointing match. I looked at the clock and figured this would be a 15 minute match, but I think the damn introductions by Jeremy Borash took longer than the actual match. Thanks for pulling another Jeff Hardy, Impact. The finish comes when Young gets pushed into Sting by Gunner, which forces a tag. Gunner takes advantage of this and hits his finisher and wins the match. Wow, so Gunner can beat Sting, but can't be Young? Ain't that a bitch? I was really disappointed with this match because there was still 10 minutes on the clock, and this was supposed to be the main event? This was almost false advertising by TNA.
Winner via pinfall: Mr. Anderson and Gunner
After the match, you can see Young celebrating like an idiot. He actually runs over to Sting to celebrate, but Sting is angry and pushes him. Well, at least they seem to be holding true to the kayfabe storyline of Young having a concussion, because if they ditched it and started having Young act normal, it really wouldn't have made any sense. After a commercial and because Wrestling Matters, we are now having a round of reactions for people over tonight's event. Sting and Young are backstage and Sting continues to tell Young to stop with the comedy while Young is confused thinking they won the match. Sting leaves him and heads towards his locker room and picked up some face paint and seems to be on a quest. We see reactions between Styles and Bully as well. Also stuff with Anderson gloating about the fact Sting just lost to Gunner. During this interview, you see screen shots of Sting on the pursuit of Anderson. Finally, Sting has found Anderson and he runs into his trailor. Sting gets in there and it appears that Anderson has the upper hand, but Sting fights back and takes him down. He grabs the face paint and proceeds to give himself a Joker face with the red lips, while pouring red face paint all over Anderson. Sting then proceeds to choke out Hellboy and the show ends with Anderson down on the ground. Did Sting just kill Anderson? Seriously, Anderson isn't moving. Sting killed him. STING KILLED HIM!!! There is a murderer running around on tv!!! Ok, joking aside, I wasn't a big fan of how the show ended. I really don't like these interviews to end the show. It might have worked in the original ECW, but this just comes off as half assed since this company is saying wrestling matters, but doesn't seem to show enough of it. I wouldn't be surprised if the entire wrestling time for Impact this week was shorter than Raw's two longest matches this week.
Overall Impression:
Not a good showing by Impact this week, but it's somehow awesome compared to last week's Impact. There was not one match that really stuck out as a decent wrestling match. It is almost embarassing to say the best match was probably the Mex American match, and that one was a mess. There was a couple of moments that I enjoyed, like when Magnus was on commentary or the promo between Angle and Jarrett. Heck, I would go even further to say this show needed more Magnus on commentary because his commentary was almost a breath of fresh air compared to what was going around. Plus, I think it would have been awesome to hear his thoughts about all of the other crap that is going around on Impact. This was not a good edition for Impact heading into their PPV. They did build up the card, but not in the most apporpriate way possible. We had one more match announced for the PPV in the Triple Theat for the X Divisoin title, but why couldn't they have a in ring conflict as opposed to a crappy backstage scene? After tonight's showing, I don't think anyone is excited for Slam based on the buildup and the actual card, but I will dig into that more on the Rundown. Just a lot of examples tonight as to why TNA still needs a lot of work before we can start to think of them as a competator to the WWE. I almost wonder if Impact is climbing a mountain they will never be able to reach? Well, that is going to do it for the review and I hope you enjoyed it. As always, tell me what you thought of my review and tonight's show. I am going to try to watch SD this week, but a SD review won't happen since I got a lot on my plate for the upcoming weekend. The Slam Rundown is almost complete, so that should be coming out. I will see you guys and girls on the next WrestlingNerd show, see you next time, and let's have Optimus sum up my feelings of this week's show....
No comments:
Post a Comment